Monday, November 7, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Bloody show!
Yep! It was definitely the bloody show. I went back to bed last night around 330/400am and slept well- probably slept through any contractions. I slept on my left side with no problems... listened to my hypnobirthing track and rocked in the glider and then listened to it again in bed. I slept right thru everything. I then switched sides to sleep on my right side for a bt and when I did I got a contraction. Ouch. Just menstrual cramp like around 6ish... got up about 5 minutes ago (its now around 730) to use the bathroom during another contraction and had to poopy. And before I pooped and after I peed I wiped and there was the bloody show! YEAY!!! It's happening!!! We are definitely in the early stages of labor! This is wonderful!
I wonder if eating that pineapple worked! lol? Who knows! But I ate pineapple yesterday and that seems to be right after eating that the contractions started! :) Or it could be just good timing. That's probably more like it. lol. I also drank organic pregnancy tea and red raspberry leaf tea to help get things started around 6pm last night. Maybe that helped too. Or maybe it's all a coincidence since I am around 40 weeks and 3 days going.
Anyway- the bloody show is just exactly like a light period. Stringy and red and pink and mucousy- no big whoop. Haven't seen a period in 10 months and can't say I'm looking forward to those again. :\
Husband still has pink eye. Noooo!!! :( Please please heal up today or tomorrow!!! I need you hubby!!! I need you to be ok to hold your baby too!!!!!!
XOXOXOX~~
I wonder if eating that pineapple worked! lol? Who knows! But I ate pineapple yesterday and that seems to be right after eating that the contractions started! :) Or it could be just good timing. That's probably more like it. lol. I also drank organic pregnancy tea and red raspberry leaf tea to help get things started around 6pm last night. Maybe that helped too. Or maybe it's all a coincidence since I am around 40 weeks and 3 days going.
Anyway- the bloody show is just exactly like a light period. Stringy and red and pink and mucousy- no big whoop. Haven't seen a period in 10 months and can't say I'm looking forward to those again. :\
Husband still has pink eye. Noooo!!! :( Please please heal up today or tomorrow!!! I need you hubby!!! I need you to be ok to hold your baby too!!!!!!
XOXOXOX~~
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Cramping and bloody show???
It's about 2am on Sunday September 25 technically. I just woke up from a contraction (I think) and headed to the bathroom to pee... on the way there (a very short distance mind you) I noticed a crampy feeling and after peeing and wiping I noticed there was a very small bit of brownish pink color to the discharge.... what the? I wiped again and more of the same! MOre pink than brown... but a close mixture of the two! Is this the bloody show? Did I just loose or am I losing my mucous plug? I looked in the toilet and there was a defintie amount of brownish pinksih discharge in the toilet on the bottom... so SOMETHING is defintely happening to my cervix right now!!! Exciting!!!! This is probably it then! This is the start of early labor. I think! lol...
Oh brother and did I mention my poor poor husband has freaking pink eye?! Yep. OUt of hte blue just like that... for no reason at all.. his poor eyes... both are infected and he looks like a scary monester... a beautiful and handsome and scary little monster... the poor thing is so upset and beside himself because he doesnt want to give the baby or me pink eye and all he wants to do is hold his little baby when she is born and help me with labor and delivery. Now we dont know what the deal will be if he has pink eye in both eyes!! What a disaster... I hope baby hangs on for a few more days... hang in there baby! Wait til daddy is a little better!!
Oh my poor hubby!!!! Please God HEAL HIS EYES TONIGHT!!!! XOXOXX!!!!!
Oh brother and did I mention my poor poor husband has freaking pink eye?! Yep. OUt of hte blue just like that... for no reason at all.. his poor eyes... both are infected and he looks like a scary monester... a beautiful and handsome and scary little monster... the poor thing is so upset and beside himself because he doesnt want to give the baby or me pink eye and all he wants to do is hold his little baby when she is born and help me with labor and delivery. Now we dont know what the deal will be if he has pink eye in both eyes!! What a disaster... I hope baby hangs on for a few more days... hang in there baby! Wait til daddy is a little better!!
Oh my poor hubby!!!! Please God HEAL HIS EYES TONIGHT!!!! XOXOXX!!!!!
Friday, September 23, 2011
Is it hammer time?
So this morning I got up around 557am and decided to go sit in my rocking glider in the nursery for a bit. My hips hurt and my nose was congested and I just couldnt get comfortable flipping and flopping in bed trying to find a side-lying position that didn't ache for more than 10 minutes. I must have rocked or glided myself to sleep in the babies room because right around 6am I had a definite contraction. My entire stomach balled up very tightly.... more so than it ever has with the braxton hicks contractions where the stomach got hard and pretty much just felt like my forehead. Now I had a definite balling up! I could see it AND feel it. Excellent!!! I timed it the best way I know how to (which is very confusing by the way) using my chronograph watch (which was purchased specifically for this purpose) and the next one came around 6:20... twenty minutes apart! Wow- could this be the start of early labor??
Please God I certainly hope so. Today is Padre Pio's feast day and I thought wouldn't it be EXCELLENT to be born on this blessed day! IN the meantime... I was up and about walking around drinking water and took a bath... I got another contraction (I'm pretty sure I think)in the bathtub that again was about 20 minutes apart from the last one I had. (I think- again this isn't precise its kind of hard to tell when they start and end and when to time it) :\
Anyway- trying not to get too excited as this could be SOMETHING or it could totally be NOTHING. Im really hoping it is something though... but I'm also betting that if it IS something - probably not going to give birth today on Padre Pio's feast day. :\ This might be one of those really long labors that goes into the weekend.
ON that note... we have a fetal non-stress test scheduled for today. Bah. That is at 230pm and I'm not sure I want to go. :\ I dont want to get suckered in to staying there or being admitted.. but then again- it would be good to know baby is alright too and not in distress... though really- there really is not even a sliver of indication that she would be so again it feels superfluous to go to this appointment... less intervention the better in my book.. but I also don't want to be stupid especially with a history of still birth and miscarriages in my family. You know what I mean?
It's about 15 minutes from the last contraction... I hope I get another one soon... I hope they start getting closer together and not farther apart!
ALso, it's hard to tell if it's a contraction or the baby just moving about now. She likes to curl up in there with her butt up by my breast bone.
Also, I am starving and don't know what to eat!!! I had a snickers bar (a medium sized one) and a reese's cup at 3am... hehe... and then I had a muffin (a really small fiber one muffin) and a soft tortilla with cheese and spinach on it a few minutes ago... Still- ravenous... drinking tea and drinking water in the meantime...
Oh I also wanted to mention that last night... or yesterday earl morning I woke up and had a HORRIBLE case of itchies on my belly button area... I can't tell but it looks like maybe I have 5 ore 6 very small reddish stretch marks around my belly button. Yuck! But they could just be little scars that are stretched out from ingrown hairs I have yanked in the past. Hard to tell, my money is on the stretch marks though. Still- if that's the only place I get them- I am lucky!!! I will take it! Plus they will fade to a silverly white eventually and you won't be able to see them really so who cares. Also- those are really the only ones I noticed and they are not any bigger than a pinky finger nail in length and about the width of a toothpick. So please.
The carpal tunnel is really bad all day every day in my right arm and sometimes in my left. I get relief by sleeping iwth my arm on a pillow at night but during the day I have to get up and walk around and that usually makes it subside.
My feet were blown up like balloons yesterday. Ew! HAHAA- gross! Didn't hurt just looked bad. They are back to normal this morning after sleeping and elevating them.
I went and got a pedicure with mom earlier this week on my first or second due date and got a haircut yesterday on my last due date. I'm all spruced up and ready to meet my little darling angle baby girl!!!
The house is all in order and looks fabulous in our fall decor. I still need some small pumpkins for the mantle piece and three pumpkins (mommy daddy baby) for the front porch. Debating getting those NOW or making that an errand to run with the baby in a few weeks...
The yard looks GORGEOUS - hubby really out did himself with pruning everything back and making everything look storybook pretty! He trimmed all the hedges and bushes and cut down brush and cut back the bushes that were overgrown and did the lawn... it looks soo pretty!
I still can't believe we are homeowners and have this beautiful perfect little house all to ourselves... for now! :)
Carpal tunnel killing my right hand so i type with only left hand right now. Not bad! lol... Debating seeing a movie today and telling work I am working from home... or better yet- I might just go in for a bit just to show my face and then leave after an hour or two... I will probably just do that... less hassle and I look like a trooper. =D Beacuse I AM a trooper people! Nothing is going to stop me or keep me down! lol...
ALso, my husband is a DREAM BOAT... oh dear Lord- what a blessing. He is the most tender loving special brilliant amazing person I have ever met in my entire life or previous life!!!! He is just brilliant in every way possible. I wish I knew how to express to him how much I look up to him and admire him. It's amazing to be married to someone that you want to be like! Someone you just worship and adore and are so devoted to. He just rocks my world on so many levels in so many ways and inspires me to be a better person to be the best person- the best version of myself... I have to keep working on that. He is just magic. I'm so in love with him and am so grateful for the opportunity to know him and to bear witness to his life and he to mine. I am remarkably blessed to be his wife. My life is such a treat and a sweet dream now- just the way he wrote it! XOXOXOXX!!!!
Also- it's now about 25 minutes since that last contraction. Drats!! What the!? :( Come on baby! Keep contracting and coming to mommie and daddie... scooch your way out of there please!! Come cuddle with us!! We love and miss you so very much!!!
Please God I certainly hope so. Today is Padre Pio's feast day and I thought wouldn't it be EXCELLENT to be born on this blessed day! IN the meantime... I was up and about walking around drinking water and took a bath... I got another contraction (I'm pretty sure I think)in the bathtub that again was about 20 minutes apart from the last one I had. (I think- again this isn't precise its kind of hard to tell when they start and end and when to time it) :\
Anyway- trying not to get too excited as this could be SOMETHING or it could totally be NOTHING. Im really hoping it is something though... but I'm also betting that if it IS something - probably not going to give birth today on Padre Pio's feast day. :\ This might be one of those really long labors that goes into the weekend.
ON that note... we have a fetal non-stress test scheduled for today. Bah. That is at 230pm and I'm not sure I want to go. :\ I dont want to get suckered in to staying there or being admitted.. but then again- it would be good to know baby is alright too and not in distress... though really- there really is not even a sliver of indication that she would be so again it feels superfluous to go to this appointment... less intervention the better in my book.. but I also don't want to be stupid especially with a history of still birth and miscarriages in my family. You know what I mean?
It's about 15 minutes from the last contraction... I hope I get another one soon... I hope they start getting closer together and not farther apart!
ALso, it's hard to tell if it's a contraction or the baby just moving about now. She likes to curl up in there with her butt up by my breast bone.
Also, I am starving and don't know what to eat!!! I had a snickers bar (a medium sized one) and a reese's cup at 3am... hehe... and then I had a muffin (a really small fiber one muffin) and a soft tortilla with cheese and spinach on it a few minutes ago... Still- ravenous... drinking tea and drinking water in the meantime...
Oh I also wanted to mention that last night... or yesterday earl morning I woke up and had a HORRIBLE case of itchies on my belly button area... I can't tell but it looks like maybe I have 5 ore 6 very small reddish stretch marks around my belly button. Yuck! But they could just be little scars that are stretched out from ingrown hairs I have yanked in the past. Hard to tell, my money is on the stretch marks though. Still- if that's the only place I get them- I am lucky!!! I will take it! Plus they will fade to a silverly white eventually and you won't be able to see them really so who cares. Also- those are really the only ones I noticed and they are not any bigger than a pinky finger nail in length and about the width of a toothpick. So please.
The carpal tunnel is really bad all day every day in my right arm and sometimes in my left. I get relief by sleeping iwth my arm on a pillow at night but during the day I have to get up and walk around and that usually makes it subside.
My feet were blown up like balloons yesterday. Ew! HAHAA- gross! Didn't hurt just looked bad. They are back to normal this morning after sleeping and elevating them.
I went and got a pedicure with mom earlier this week on my first or second due date and got a haircut yesterday on my last due date. I'm all spruced up and ready to meet my little darling angle baby girl!!!
The house is all in order and looks fabulous in our fall decor. I still need some small pumpkins for the mantle piece and three pumpkins (mommy daddy baby) for the front porch. Debating getting those NOW or making that an errand to run with the baby in a few weeks...
The yard looks GORGEOUS - hubby really out did himself with pruning everything back and making everything look storybook pretty! He trimmed all the hedges and bushes and cut down brush and cut back the bushes that were overgrown and did the lawn... it looks soo pretty!
I still can't believe we are homeowners and have this beautiful perfect little house all to ourselves... for now! :)
Carpal tunnel killing my right hand so i type with only left hand right now. Not bad! lol... Debating seeing a movie today and telling work I am working from home... or better yet- I might just go in for a bit just to show my face and then leave after an hour or two... I will probably just do that... less hassle and I look like a trooper. =D Beacuse I AM a trooper people! Nothing is going to stop me or keep me down! lol...
ALso, my husband is a DREAM BOAT... oh dear Lord- what a blessing. He is the most tender loving special brilliant amazing person I have ever met in my entire life or previous life!!!! He is just brilliant in every way possible. I wish I knew how to express to him how much I look up to him and admire him. It's amazing to be married to someone that you want to be like! Someone you just worship and adore and are so devoted to. He just rocks my world on so many levels in so many ways and inspires me to be a better person to be the best person- the best version of myself... I have to keep working on that. He is just magic. I'm so in love with him and am so grateful for the opportunity to know him and to bear witness to his life and he to mine. I am remarkably blessed to be his wife. My life is such a treat and a sweet dream now- just the way he wrote it! XOXOXOXX!!!!
Also- it's now about 25 minutes since that last contraction. Drats!! What the!? :( Come on baby! Keep contracting and coming to mommie and daddie... scooch your way out of there please!! Come cuddle with us!! We love and miss you so very much!!!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Maybe tomorrow for sure!!
Check this out...
http://www.disabled-world.com/artman/publish/pregnancy-calculator.shtml
That's exciting stuff... My cycles tend to be anywhere from 27 to 32 days... actually seems like every other month one cycle is 27 the next is 32 then back to 27... then back to 32... which would explain why some months I ovulate on day 17 and some months its day 14 or day 19... or even day 21!
Anyway this is the argument I will give for pushing an induction date out to October 6. I will tell them I want 2 weeks from the due date of 9/22 before they can induce me. That's it. It's that simple. I take full responsbility. I will also come in for fetal non-stress tests if necessary but I will not be induced at 10 days past this made-up Sept. 19 due date! Get lost. No way.
http://www.disabled-world.com/artman/publish/pregnancy-calculator.shtml
That's exciting stuff... My cycles tend to be anywhere from 27 to 32 days... actually seems like every other month one cycle is 27 the next is 32 then back to 27... then back to 32... which would explain why some months I ovulate on day 17 and some months its day 14 or day 19... or even day 21!
Anyway this is the argument I will give for pushing an induction date out to October 6. I will tell them I want 2 weeks from the due date of 9/22 before they can induce me. That's it. It's that simple. I take full responsbility. I will also come in for fetal non-stress tests if necessary but I will not be induced at 10 days past this made-up Sept. 19 due date! Get lost. No way.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Still waiting for baby...
So according to the docs I am now past my due dates of 9/19 and 9/21... but I havent reached or passed my final due date of 9/22 yet... which is the one I am kind of banking on... I know for sure I will go into labor spontaneously over the next several days... maybe Tuesday or Thursday... I feel like this is a T-day baby.... hehe... so either tomorrow the 22nd... tuesday the 27th or thursday the 29th. They also said they want to induce me on the 29th and I really really hope I go naturally before then... Ugh!
Feeling pretty good... lots of braxton hicks now and then that last for 3 or 4 minutes at a time but nothing else really to report... going for walks around neighborhood... tonight we will have sex again.. that will be third time in the last month... and might try nipple stimulation tonight too... or maybe tomorrow.
I am still going into work everyday and my coworkers are going crazy about it... but whatever... I feel up to it and I dont want to sit home being bored out of my mind so I am here and I feel good.
Might try to squeeze in a haircut tonight on the way home...I know I need to grow up. I am mad at myself for being such an egotistical cry baby self centered too. :( wah.
Feeling pretty good... lots of braxton hicks now and then that last for 3 or 4 minutes at a time but nothing else really to report... going for walks around neighborhood... tonight we will have sex again.. that will be third time in the last month... and might try nipple stimulation tonight too... or maybe tomorrow.
I am still going into work everyday and my coworkers are going crazy about it... but whatever... I feel up to it and I dont want to sit home being bored out of my mind so I am here and I feel good.
Might try to squeeze in a haircut tonight on the way home...I know I need to grow up. I am mad at myself for being such an egotistical cry baby self centered too. :( wah.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Is baby coming?
Wow here I am now on my first due date and baby isn't budging. I think I might be in early labor? Can't tell. Some random Braxton hicks and tightening of the uterus.
Sunday, September 18, 2011
40 weeks
Wow. Here we are at 4O0 weeks! Feeling great even tho I weigh 205lbs! My blood pressure and blood sugar are great. Baby doing great. Feel good. Just some anxiety and overwhelming feelings about labor and delivery and not knowing what to expect pain wise. I just hope I do t come unglued or freak out or lose it. Pretty bad carpal tunnel in right arm. Not sleeping well. Hard tO get comfortable or move around. Very puffy. But very much looking forward to seeing my little baby doll!
Monday, September 12, 2011
Carpal Tunnelllllll- OWWWW!!
Here I am at 39 weeks pregnant. I feel really good except that I now weigh 200lbs! That's 50lbs that I put on - but I have to tell you that it is still ALL BELLY! I look like I have a big beach ball shoved up under my shirt! It's perfectly round and perfectly cute! No complaints. Now with that said- it is really difficult to sit and stand and walk and lay down. Especially because now I have carpal tunnel syndrome in my right arm. It hit me about a week ago and it's just been awful!!! My right arm is CONSTANTLY numb and buzzing. My fingers are numb as I type this. It's just awful. No relief. I sleep on my left side with my right arm up on a pillow at night and that seems to help until I have to switch sides and sleep on my right side for a bit. My thighs still ache something awful but the iron pills are helping with that- though I still have to shake out my legs every night.
Not getting much consistent sleep during the night because I wake up every hour to flip over or to pee and then I feel like a bag of rocks when my feet hit the floor because I am soooo heavy!!!
On a wonderful note- the whole house is in order! We have purchased just about everything we need for baby and the house is really organized now that we have a desk and an office to put everything in. The basement is trashed though from the recent flood - not from the flood but from when the power put out our sump pump. Ugh. So we have to get the basement re-done in the spring..> Still waiting on the insurance guy- its been two weeks!! I bet they are backed up. Fine- but I don't want someone coming by when I am trying to nurse a newborn. :\
I can't believe my due date is ONE WEEK TODAY!!! Next Monday... or Tuesday... or Thursday... lol.. we'll see what happens! Stay tuned!!! :) XXOXOXOX!!! BABBYYYY!!!
Not getting much consistent sleep during the night because I wake up every hour to flip over or to pee and then I feel like a bag of rocks when my feet hit the floor because I am soooo heavy!!!
On a wonderful note- the whole house is in order! We have purchased just about everything we need for baby and the house is really organized now that we have a desk and an office to put everything in. The basement is trashed though from the recent flood - not from the flood but from when the power put out our sump pump. Ugh. So we have to get the basement re-done in the spring..> Still waiting on the insurance guy- its been two weeks!! I bet they are backed up. Fine- but I don't want someone coming by when I am trying to nurse a newborn. :\
I can't believe my due date is ONE WEEK TODAY!!! Next Monday... or Tuesday... or Thursday... lol.. we'll see what happens! Stay tuned!!! :) XXOXOXOX!!! BABBYYYY!!!
Thursday, September 8, 2011
38 weeks and 3 days or 38 weeks...close enough!
Carpal Tunnel sucks. Sleeping with right arm on a pillow helps greatly for some reason. I'm huge. Can't wait to meet baby girl. So excited! Lots of big flooding in this area - historic. We up high so we safe and dry. Hubby got job offer yesterday! YEAY!!! we in good shape. he will have month home with me and baby before he starts! what a blessing! everything in place. just a few odds and ends that are insignificant. everything in good order! Did a nice 45 minutes walk around the hood. Feel good!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Ow!! WHY!?? Carpal Tunnel HURTS!!!!
So here I am right around 38 weeks.. according to the docs- I am 38 weeks and 3 days... according to me- I will be 38 weeks tomorrow. At any rate... I am SUFFERING greatly. My entire right arm has been paralyzed with carpal tunnel syndrome for the past several days... before it used to just fall asleep as I slept on my sides... NOW it is numb and buzzing constantly with no relief.. It is excruciating pain. :( I can't take anything for it. My hand is constantly numb and it feels like I have hit my funny bone on my arm repeatedly. Oh dear God please give me some relief. Please ease my carpal tunnel nerves. I believe this is very common in late pregnancy due to the excess water weight and somehow the carpal tunnel nerves get swollen or irritated. I have to look it up. This is terrible.
It is 611am and I am up now. I also had vivid nightmares that were awful and made no sense. I hate this. LOL. AHHHH!!! Just want to REST!!! Please for the love of God- just need some REST with no nightmares and no carpal tunnel syndrome and no aching hips and legs. :( Wahh. Oh dear God my arm!!!!! I've got a heating bag on it and it seems to help a bit.
Seems like it is easing up now. I should probably not be typing on the computer. Doesn't that aggravate it? Also- it is flooding again in our area. Will this rain ever stop? Oy! :P
It is 611am and I am up now. I also had vivid nightmares that were awful and made no sense. I hate this. LOL. AHHHH!!! Just want to REST!!! Please for the love of God- just need some REST with no nightmares and no carpal tunnel syndrome and no aching hips and legs. :( Wahh. Oh dear God my arm!!!!! I've got a heating bag on it and it seems to help a bit.
Seems like it is easing up now. I should probably not be typing on the computer. Doesn't that aggravate it? Also- it is flooding again in our area. Will this rain ever stop? Oy! :P
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Achilles tendon, Swollen Feet, Carpal Tunnel, and house problems Oh my!
Oh brother. What a quandary. So much going on I don't know where to start. I guess I will start with my physical health here at 38 weeks. I seem to be gaining weight by the boatload. I went from 193 on August 18 to 197 on Sept. 3... that's like 5 lbs in 2 weeks?! How is that even possible? I'm not eating any more than usual. I've been on a few walks... but mostly I am uncomfortable, exceptionally large, and very tired. I'm almost at 200lbs and I can tell my body can't take much more of this.
On top of that, for the past few weeks I've had excrutiating pain in my achilles tendon whenever I bend over at the waist. Ouch!! Shoots right up through my heel. Common in pregnancy from what I read. Also very common in pregnancy is carpal tunnel syndrome... which has been driving me crazy the past week. Mostly on my right arm... it just starts buzzing. Totally numb and buzzy. My hand and my armpit ... my whole arm from my armpit to my hand. Ugh! Right now my right hand is numb as I type this.
Both of my arms and hands fall asleep when I sleep in bed at night. It's just awful. :( My feet are swelled up constantly like balloons. Ew. And it hurts to walk anywhere for any amount of time. It's all such a pain!
Now- add to all of this - that we just had Hurricane Irene who completed destroyed our finished basement because of a power outage and our sump pumps and b-dry like system not running.... My husband had to tear out all the carpeting in the basement. We lost 2 desks, 4 book cases, a very expensive G4 Mac computer, a very expensive vacuum cleaner, and now our basement looks like shit and is completely unusable. We have hundreds of books EVERYWHERE down there and no where to put them.
Now I am getting WACKY with ideas that our house may be completely infested with black mold. We have moisture problems EVERYWHERE!!!!!! Wet basement, no ventilation in the kitchen, water leaked panels on all of our windows, leaky roof...etc... what a mess... I can see large patches of paint on the walls that the previous owner painted over as well... they are swelled... MOISTURE. I'm seriously going to have a breakdown over here. On top of THAT mess - they are now putting in a gas line near our home for gas drilling?! WTF.
I feel like we got swindled into buying this house and I fucking hate our real estate agent. A sneaky stupid asshole who did not have our best interest in mind- only to sell a house. SURPRISE!!!!
Next house we get is going to be brand new and built by us from scratch or will be a newer spec home with no moisture problems. Cripes for as thorough as I was and as paranoid as I was about buying a home and making sure we didn't get SCREWED in the process- we still got hosed. How naive of us!! How naive to believe the home inspector too. That flaming a-hole. Everybody is so fucking shady. Nobody will return my calls and we never met the seller at closing. It all just figures. F!!!!
Anyway- here we are. Still fucking waiting for the home insurance guy to come and tell us if our basement flooding, spoiled food, and mold removal will be covered.. it's been a week now. 7 fucking days. Now I have to also worry about the HVAC system having mold in it because we had the AC on for 5 hours yesterday and when I came home.. 5 hours later... it REEKED of mold in here again. Fucking fantastic.
I just want to move. We are still locked in for another year with that $8k payout we got with buying the house so if we want to move it won't be for another year anyway... greatttt.... oh well- I'm sure it will be here before we know it. This November will be 2 years at this house... Next November we can put it on the market and move somewhere DRY and bigger... because there is NO ROOM here for another baby after this one.
On top of that, for the past few weeks I've had excrutiating pain in my achilles tendon whenever I bend over at the waist. Ouch!! Shoots right up through my heel. Common in pregnancy from what I read. Also very common in pregnancy is carpal tunnel syndrome... which has been driving me crazy the past week. Mostly on my right arm... it just starts buzzing. Totally numb and buzzy. My hand and my armpit ... my whole arm from my armpit to my hand. Ugh! Right now my right hand is numb as I type this.
Both of my arms and hands fall asleep when I sleep in bed at night. It's just awful. :( My feet are swelled up constantly like balloons. Ew. And it hurts to walk anywhere for any amount of time. It's all such a pain!
Now- add to all of this - that we just had Hurricane Irene who completed destroyed our finished basement because of a power outage and our sump pumps and b-dry like system not running.... My husband had to tear out all the carpeting in the basement. We lost 2 desks, 4 book cases, a very expensive G4 Mac computer, a very expensive vacuum cleaner, and now our basement looks like shit and is completely unusable. We have hundreds of books EVERYWHERE down there and no where to put them.
Now I am getting WACKY with ideas that our house may be completely infested with black mold. We have moisture problems EVERYWHERE!!!!!! Wet basement, no ventilation in the kitchen, water leaked panels on all of our windows, leaky roof...etc... what a mess... I can see large patches of paint on the walls that the previous owner painted over as well... they are swelled... MOISTURE. I'm seriously going to have a breakdown over here. On top of THAT mess - they are now putting in a gas line near our home for gas drilling?! WTF.
I feel like we got swindled into buying this house and I fucking hate our real estate agent. A sneaky stupid asshole who did not have our best interest in mind- only to sell a house. SURPRISE!!!!
Next house we get is going to be brand new and built by us from scratch or will be a newer spec home with no moisture problems. Cripes for as thorough as I was and as paranoid as I was about buying a home and making sure we didn't get SCREWED in the process- we still got hosed. How naive of us!! How naive to believe the home inspector too. That flaming a-hole. Everybody is so fucking shady. Nobody will return my calls and we never met the seller at closing. It all just figures. F!!!!
Anyway- here we are. Still fucking waiting for the home insurance guy to come and tell us if our basement flooding, spoiled food, and mold removal will be covered.. it's been a week now. 7 fucking days. Now I have to also worry about the HVAC system having mold in it because we had the AC on for 5 hours yesterday and when I came home.. 5 hours later... it REEKED of mold in here again. Fucking fantastic.
I just want to move. We are still locked in for another year with that $8k payout we got with buying the house so if we want to move it won't be for another year anyway... greatttt.... oh well- I'm sure it will be here before we know it. This November will be 2 years at this house... Next November we can put it on the market and move somewhere DRY and bigger... because there is NO ROOM here for another baby after this one.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
37 weeks and counting....Note to Self
So here I am at full-term! 37 weeks! I can safely give birth between now (Aug 30) and 42 weeks (October 6 by my estimation). I'm excited!!! I will have the whole month of September to settle in and figure out what this little baby is going to do!
In the meantime here are some physical updates...
I have excrutiating pain in my right heel when I bend at the waist and my feet are planted. It's achillie's tendon pain. Ouch! OUCH!!! OUCH!!!! Oh my word. That is crazy weird burning pain in that right heel that just started up about a week or a few days ago... just when I bend over... to pick up a towel to put on panties or shorts to pick something up off the floor... OWWWWWW!!!! Weird awful pain. Boo on that...
Some bleeding gums finally... just recently maybe the past few days ... notice some blood in sink when brushing teeth...
Hmm what else? Nothing else really... some sciatia in the left butt cheek.. ow again. But that comes and goes... and basically I am up to 200lbs now. Yipes! I've gained 50lbs - which isn't OUTRAGEOUS. I mean it's not like I gained 70lbs or even 60lbs... This is my first pregnancy after all and I didn't exactly watch what I ate and didn't work out at all.. bad Laney. Shame on me... but hey- it was my first prenancy and yes I over indulged a bit and could have walked more and ate less fast food... sorry!
Other than that I feel great. No complaints. None at all.. it is very difficult to sleep on side and get comfortable or to flip positions with this humoungous belly! But again- I can live with it... I have some SEriOUS weightloss work ahead for me but am really looking forward to getting in shape and being a fit mommy!!
Hope to start trying again by the summer time for a new baby so by the time this baby is about a year old... we'll be trying again for another one! Weeee!!! That should give me enough time to get my body in shape. 9 months to get this way and about 9 months to go back!
In the meantime here are some physical updates...
I have excrutiating pain in my right heel when I bend at the waist and my feet are planted. It's achillie's tendon pain. Ouch! OUCH!!! OUCH!!!! Oh my word. That is crazy weird burning pain in that right heel that just started up about a week or a few days ago... just when I bend over... to pick up a towel to put on panties or shorts to pick something up off the floor... OWWWWWW!!!! Weird awful pain. Boo on that...
Some bleeding gums finally... just recently maybe the past few days ... notice some blood in sink when brushing teeth...
Hmm what else? Nothing else really... some sciatia in the left butt cheek.. ow again. But that comes and goes... and basically I am up to 200lbs now. Yipes! I've gained 50lbs - which isn't OUTRAGEOUS. I mean it's not like I gained 70lbs or even 60lbs... This is my first pregnancy after all and I didn't exactly watch what I ate and didn't work out at all.. bad Laney. Shame on me... but hey- it was my first prenancy and yes I over indulged a bit and could have walked more and ate less fast food... sorry!
Other than that I feel great. No complaints. None at all.. it is very difficult to sleep on side and get comfortable or to flip positions with this humoungous belly! But again- I can live with it... I have some SEriOUS weightloss work ahead for me but am really looking forward to getting in shape and being a fit mommy!!
Hope to start trying again by the summer time for a new baby so by the time this baby is about a year old... we'll be trying again for another one! Weeee!!! That should give me enough time to get my body in shape. 9 months to get this way and about 9 months to go back!
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Baby likes to get up and go at 930am and 930pm! and Ice Water!!
I am now 36 weeks!!!
Baby likes to get up and go at 930am and 930pm! She likes to squirm and wiggle around at these times- I've noticed a trend! XOXX!! So cute! Little babieeeee!!! We wrapped up our final birth class last night. It was ok- we saw a video on the c-sections that are performed as induced and emergency. Ugh. Madone. Also found out that they give Pitocin to make placenta come out and to contract the uterus and that it's pretty standard. Ugh. Don't want that.
We had to put our hands in icewater for the length of a contraction and let me tell you - I underestimated how difficult that was to do!!!!! I thought it would be no sweat... well first you start off with just your fingertips in the water... then you have to submerge your whole hand at the 'top' of the 'contraction' and it was awful!!! Just awful!!!
BUT!!! I kept my hand in there and did not pull it out!!! Yes- I was vocal.. and said.. Oh Dear! Oh my Lord! Oh dear! and was laughing because it was so uncomfortable... but I KEPT MY HAND IN THE WATER... so it was pretty interesting to see that EVERYBODY ELSE was as quiet as a MOUSE!!! AND DIDNT SAY A PEEP... BUT!!!!! Big tough guy with the tatoos and his big tough wife BOTH PULLED THEIR HANDS OUT OF THE WATER!!!!!!! My husband and I saw them!!!! They couldnt take it!!!!
So yeah- whooppee doo- you didn't make a sound... but we know the truth! You couldn't handle it!!! Sure I am vocal and made sounds and talked my way through it- BUT I DID IT BITCHES. =D Take that!!!
I
AM
TITANIUM!!!!!
XOXOXX!!!
Baby likes to get up and go at 930am and 930pm! She likes to squirm and wiggle around at these times- I've noticed a trend! XOXX!! So cute! Little babieeeee!!! We wrapped up our final birth class last night. It was ok- we saw a video on the c-sections that are performed as induced and emergency. Ugh. Madone. Also found out that they give Pitocin to make placenta come out and to contract the uterus and that it's pretty standard. Ugh. Don't want that.
We had to put our hands in icewater for the length of a contraction and let me tell you - I underestimated how difficult that was to do!!!!! I thought it would be no sweat... well first you start off with just your fingertips in the water... then you have to submerge your whole hand at the 'top' of the 'contraction' and it was awful!!! Just awful!!!
BUT!!! I kept my hand in there and did not pull it out!!! Yes- I was vocal.. and said.. Oh Dear! Oh my Lord! Oh dear! and was laughing because it was so uncomfortable... but I KEPT MY HAND IN THE WATER... so it was pretty interesting to see that EVERYBODY ELSE was as quiet as a MOUSE!!! AND DIDNT SAY A PEEP... BUT!!!!! Big tough guy with the tatoos and his big tough wife BOTH PULLED THEIR HANDS OUT OF THE WATER!!!!!!! My husband and I saw them!!!! They couldnt take it!!!!
So yeah- whooppee doo- you didn't make a sound... but we know the truth! You couldn't handle it!!! Sure I am vocal and made sounds and talked my way through it- BUT I DID IT BITCHES. =D Take that!!!
I
AM
TITANIUM!!!!!
XOXOXX!!!
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Rant a roo! Time to let it all hang out...
Ok. I'm bad. Everybody is getting on my nerves now. Even newly pregnant moms who are 9 WEEKS pregnant and are ooing and ahhing over every little ache and pain and complaining about somthing or other... really??? REALLY???? You are nine WEEKS pregnant- wait till you are NINE MONTHS and can't move!!!! Get over it!!! ::blushes:: Why am I so bad? That was bad. My horomones made me say it.
Jeepers- this must be similar to how women who've already had children feel when... wait a sec.... ahahahaa! This must be what my mother meant by- just wait laney... wait til you are a mom.... one day... or maybe it's similar to how some women who've been through something already and watch another one go through it and they are wise and kind and know that everyone makes their way differently through this process.
Oh wise women who have gone before us in labor and delivery and child rearing- have mercy on us first time moms and continue to shower us with your kindness and understanding and please help me to do the same for those moms who come after me. Grant me grace, patience, kindness, and humility to endure the fear, anxiety, and irritations of the coming weeks. Help me to know I am not alone. Others have been there, done that, and lived to tell about it.
Man, I'm scared. I've got 35 days to go and I am terrified. I was fine up until a day ago. Now I can't move, can't breathe, can't sleep, can't poop, can't stand anybody, and can't see any other way out of this! lol. Add to the fact that I am the primary bread winner right now and we can't live on one income alone and my husband's unemployment ran out last week and he still can't find a job after 1.3 years of unemployment (thanks to outsourcing to Bangalore) and I'm not only scared of what the heck my body and mind are going to go through in the labor and delivery process but what the devil are we going to do with this financial stuff? I'm really scared of post-partum depression now because I read that financial worry can sometimes trigger a feeling of hopelessness. On the bright side, I've never had a boxing match with depression before. Though, I know it does run in my family on my mom's side... so of course I am terrified that something will trigger it. My anxiety is through the roof right now and I'm still playing the happy go lucky it will all work out card to our friends and family. My in-laws are clueless and avoid the subject all together and act like we've got it all under control and everything is ok when they know full well that dh has been out of work for the past 16 months with no prospects in site. But it's not their fault and to be fair we don't share much with them by way of our financial situation. But I don't even know if they know how bad it is. And I guess it doesn't matter anyway. They have their own things to deal with. I just feel like we are hanging out here on a tree branch over a cliff and everyone is watching us from the safe land waiting for some helicopter to lift us out and praying that when we fall some safe downy tree will catch us.
My parents are pretty supportive but really they can't do much $$ to help us out. They are really clued in to what our financial picture looks like. Of course. Because I don't feel judged by them and they know that I've always just done the best I could and I made some mistakes along the way but at least I made something. At least I am a self-made woman. I've had to do it all on my own. And I am PROUD OF THAT. But that doesn't make this situation any easier to bear. In some instances it's kind of a slap in the face that I couldn't figure out how to make it on my own with less debt. But I honestly had no guidance. I blindly did the best I could. I knew I wanted a better life and knew an education was the way to that life. And it was! Without my education, I'd never have gotten to work in the field that I do, never would have met my amazing husband, never would have become the full and fabulous person that I am today. Never would have been able to travel the world and studied abroad and written articles and certainly would never have had the opportunity to fulfill my dream of getting my doctorate and becoming Dr. Lane Cardinal.
My husband's family are fairly well to do but they are recently divorced so who knows what the real financial picture looks like there although they are both pretty well off and always have been. Both of them have just ignored the problem that dh and I are on the brink of financial ruin because of the unemployment and my unpaid maternity leave in a few weeks. Well- I know his mom would help in any way she ever could but we are too proud to say anything to her and she's got a daughter who's pretty much financially dependent on her anyway- she doesn't need to grown 30 year olds adding to her stress. My fil? Hard to say. He's in his own world. He would never touch $$$ and our issues with it with a ten foot pole. Never offers any words or advice, never says he'll help us out or think about moving in with me... in his big 3 bedroom house that only he lives in. Never would say so much as a peep to help us out or let us know he is there to support us. Thanks dad. Guess he doesn't get it. Things come full circle and when it comes time to band together and help YOU out when you are stuck... don't look at us?? That's what it feels like.
And you know- here we are- just trying to keep our heads above water as our basement floods, our roof leaks, our pond liner is torn, and we haven't bought our heating oil or firewood for the fall yet because we are pretty much plowing through our savings to get things ready for baby, and all the other life stuff that costs a zillion dollars is getting in the way first.... there are the car inspections, electric bills, groceries, cell phones, internet, car gas, car insurance, car payments, student loans, mortgage, credit cards, water bill... I don't know... if we didn't have to eat- we'd be rich!
I feel a lot of guilt too because my husband came to our marriage with no debt. Not even student loan debt and he went to an Ivy league uni- his parents paid for his entire tuition. He never had to pay rent, never had a car payment, paid in full upfront with cash or given to us by his parents. Never had credit card debt. What a blessing.
Then there's me- my dad isn't a surgeon. He's an insurance salesman. And a damn good one too! So my parents did the best they could with what they had. I was pretty much left on my own to figure out financial things and how to make my dreams work. They certainly couldn't afford to pay for any college tuition - they had their own So I had to take out student loans for undergrad and grad and now I'm paying for it. I have always bought my own cars and had to take out loans for those and still pay on them, credit cards? Uhm yeah. Hello. I'm a girl and when you are out of school on your own and trying to make ends meet on a $10/ hour crap job and waitressing on the weekends to pay the rent... sometimes credit cards were the evil necessity. Of course they got racked up there. I've gotten a handle on those now but it doesn't change the fact that they are still there ... slowly going away... but those freaking student loans?! That's my albatross that will be with me for a long time tied around my neck. It's like paying a second mortgage on a house. Ironically NOW I work at a university - so getting my PhD is covered and my kids tuition will be free. THANK GOD. I never want my kids to go through what I'm going through. Debt sucks.
My heart hurts and it feels as though my whole life I've had to bear the weight of this financial mess for so long that I don't know what it's like to not have that anxiety. It's a norm for me now. That constant undercurrent of an impending sense of doom... that any minute the other shoe will drop and the gig is up. I've always lived pay check to paycheck or worse... have always robbed peter to pay paul. Now here I am - 36 years old and I wonder how much longer this game of cat and mouse is going to go on. It's exhausting. It's a way of life. And I just don't want to do it anymore. But I have to. I must endure and push through this and find a way to pay these bills and pay down this debt. Not for my sake- my chance at a peaceful mind and financial security has long since passed.... but for my children's sake. A gift I can give them. To never ever ever let them ever have to know the pressure, the anxiety, the guilt, the stress, the death to the soul that DEBT brings. I won't let it kill their dreams too. EVER. That is my mission. No debt for my kids. Financial literacy from preschool to the grave. Save SAVE SAVE. I honestly feel like we are on the brink of another great depression. It's really really bad out there if I'm feeling it. Trust me. I've alluded this financial scene for three decades now and if I AM feeling the effects of the unemployment rate, the unemployability of a highly qualified man, the weight of a mortgage and student loans... then I know financial ruin and disaster for the rest of the country is right around the corner... I can feel it in the air... can't you?
How can my parents bend over backwards to do so much for my husband and I and my husband's family acts so aloof about it all? Maybe because they're done. They've given him so much already maybe they are tired of it. My parents couldn't do much for me growing up so now they are finishing strong. And to me - that's all that matters!
Happy thoughts!
Jeepers- this must be similar to how women who've already had children feel when... wait a sec.... ahahahaa! This must be what my mother meant by- just wait laney... wait til you are a mom.... one day... or maybe it's similar to how some women who've been through something already and watch another one go through it and they are wise and kind and know that everyone makes their way differently through this process.
Oh wise women who have gone before us in labor and delivery and child rearing- have mercy on us first time moms and continue to shower us with your kindness and understanding and please help me to do the same for those moms who come after me. Grant me grace, patience, kindness, and humility to endure the fear, anxiety, and irritations of the coming weeks. Help me to know I am not alone. Others have been there, done that, and lived to tell about it.
Man, I'm scared. I've got 35 days to go and I am terrified. I was fine up until a day ago. Now I can't move, can't breathe, can't sleep, can't poop, can't stand anybody, and can't see any other way out of this! lol. Add to the fact that I am the primary bread winner right now and we can't live on one income alone and my husband's unemployment ran out last week and he still can't find a job after 1.3 years of unemployment (thanks to outsourcing to Bangalore) and I'm not only scared of what the heck my body and mind are going to go through in the labor and delivery process but what the devil are we going to do with this financial stuff? I'm really scared of post-partum depression now because I read that financial worry can sometimes trigger a feeling of hopelessness. On the bright side, I've never had a boxing match with depression before. Though, I know it does run in my family on my mom's side... so of course I am terrified that something will trigger it. My anxiety is through the roof right now and I'm still playing the happy go lucky it will all work out card to our friends and family. My in-laws are clueless and avoid the subject all together and act like we've got it all under control and everything is ok when they know full well that dh has been out of work for the past 16 months with no prospects in site. But it's not their fault and to be fair we don't share much with them by way of our financial situation. But I don't even know if they know how bad it is. And I guess it doesn't matter anyway. They have their own things to deal with. I just feel like we are hanging out here on a tree branch over a cliff and everyone is watching us from the safe land waiting for some helicopter to lift us out and praying that when we fall some safe downy tree will catch us.
My parents are pretty supportive but really they can't do much $$ to help us out. They are really clued in to what our financial picture looks like. Of course. Because I don't feel judged by them and they know that I've always just done the best I could and I made some mistakes along the way but at least I made something. At least I am a self-made woman. I've had to do it all on my own. And I am PROUD OF THAT. But that doesn't make this situation any easier to bear. In some instances it's kind of a slap in the face that I couldn't figure out how to make it on my own with less debt. But I honestly had no guidance. I blindly did the best I could. I knew I wanted a better life and knew an education was the way to that life. And it was! Without my education, I'd never have gotten to work in the field that I do, never would have met my amazing husband, never would have become the full and fabulous person that I am today. Never would have been able to travel the world and studied abroad and written articles and certainly would never have had the opportunity to fulfill my dream of getting my doctorate and becoming Dr. Lane Cardinal.
My husband's family are fairly well to do but they are recently divorced so who knows what the real financial picture looks like there although they are both pretty well off and always have been. Both of them have just ignored the problem that dh and I are on the brink of financial ruin because of the unemployment and my unpaid maternity leave in a few weeks. Well- I know his mom would help in any way she ever could but we are too proud to say anything to her and she's got a daughter who's pretty much financially dependent on her anyway- she doesn't need to grown 30 year olds adding to her stress. My fil? Hard to say. He's in his own world. He would never touch $$$ and our issues with it with a ten foot pole. Never offers any words or advice, never says he'll help us out or think about moving in with me... in his big 3 bedroom house that only he lives in. Never would say so much as a peep to help us out or let us know he is there to support us. Thanks dad. Guess he doesn't get it. Things come full circle and when it comes time to band together and help YOU out when you are stuck... don't look at us?? That's what it feels like.
And you know- here we are- just trying to keep our heads above water as our basement floods, our roof leaks, our pond liner is torn, and we haven't bought our heating oil or firewood for the fall yet because we are pretty much plowing through our savings to get things ready for baby, and all the other life stuff that costs a zillion dollars is getting in the way first.... there are the car inspections, electric bills, groceries, cell phones, internet, car gas, car insurance, car payments, student loans, mortgage, credit cards, water bill... I don't know... if we didn't have to eat- we'd be rich!
I feel a lot of guilt too because my husband came to our marriage with no debt. Not even student loan debt and he went to an Ivy league uni- his parents paid for his entire tuition. He never had to pay rent, never had a car payment, paid in full upfront with cash or given to us by his parents. Never had credit card debt. What a blessing.
Then there's me- my dad isn't a surgeon. He's an insurance salesman. And a damn good one too! So my parents did the best they could with what they had. I was pretty much left on my own to figure out financial things and how to make my dreams work. They certainly couldn't afford to pay for any college tuition - they had their own So I had to take out student loans for undergrad and grad and now I'm paying for it. I have always bought my own cars and had to take out loans for those and still pay on them, credit cards? Uhm yeah. Hello. I'm a girl and when you are out of school on your own and trying to make ends meet on a $10/ hour crap job and waitressing on the weekends to pay the rent... sometimes credit cards were the evil necessity. Of course they got racked up there. I've gotten a handle on those now but it doesn't change the fact that they are still there ... slowly going away... but those freaking student loans?! That's my albatross that will be with me for a long time tied around my neck. It's like paying a second mortgage on a house. Ironically NOW I work at a university - so getting my PhD is covered and my kids tuition will be free. THANK GOD. I never want my kids to go through what I'm going through. Debt sucks.
My heart hurts and it feels as though my whole life I've had to bear the weight of this financial mess for so long that I don't know what it's like to not have that anxiety. It's a norm for me now. That constant undercurrent of an impending sense of doom... that any minute the other shoe will drop and the gig is up. I've always lived pay check to paycheck or worse... have always robbed peter to pay paul. Now here I am - 36 years old and I wonder how much longer this game of cat and mouse is going to go on. It's exhausting. It's a way of life. And I just don't want to do it anymore. But I have to. I must endure and push through this and find a way to pay these bills and pay down this debt. Not for my sake- my chance at a peaceful mind and financial security has long since passed.... but for my children's sake. A gift I can give them. To never ever ever let them ever have to know the pressure, the anxiety, the guilt, the stress, the death to the soul that DEBT brings. I won't let it kill their dreams too. EVER. That is my mission. No debt for my kids. Financial literacy from preschool to the grave. Save SAVE SAVE. I honestly feel like we are on the brink of another great depression. It's really really bad out there if I'm feeling it. Trust me. I've alluded this financial scene for three decades now and if I AM feeling the effects of the unemployment rate, the unemployability of a highly qualified man, the weight of a mortgage and student loans... then I know financial ruin and disaster for the rest of the country is right around the corner... I can feel it in the air... can't you?
How can my parents bend over backwards to do so much for my husband and I and my husband's family acts so aloof about it all? Maybe because they're done. They've given him so much already maybe they are tired of it. My parents couldn't do much for me growing up so now they are finishing strong. And to me - that's all that matters!
Happy thoughts!
What? Me worry? Nahhhhh!
Omg. What has become of me?! What is wrong with Laney Marie? :( I am 36 weeks and my tummy is enormous. I can't breathe, it's hard to walk, sleeping??? WHATS THAT?!!! Bowel movements?!! NEVER HEARD OF THEM. What's that? My face looks like a watermelon? I'm almost 200lbs and never weighed more than 140 in my life?? NOTHING FITS??? My poor feet. I'm a heifer. and Yes I am overjoyed to be pregnant, it's beautiful and wonderful. We are very blessed. We've waited through 3 miscarriages in a row to finally conceive our little miracle. I have loving friends and family. A good support system at work... so tell me this... why on God's green earth do I just feel like I want to beat everybody up!? Oh dear Lord! Is it horomones or what? I feel like I'm out of control.
Everybody either says or does something to drive me up a wall. I am constantly irritated. I'm even and especially irritated by OTHER MOMS!!! Really?? What the heck is THAT all about? I read posts about newly pregnant women who are 9 weeks along... NINE WEEKS!!! and they are complaining about this or that... or ouch this or ouch that and I'm like... ARE.... YOU...... KIDDING..... ME????!!!!!!
You are nine WEEKS pregnant- not nine MONTHS pregnant! OMG. It blows my mind. And who the heck am I to feel that way?? I was there once. To be fair- I've gone this entire pregnancy without much complaint and no reason to really complain. I still have no reason to REALLY complain... but now I just can't stand myself or more specifically - OTHER PEOPLE.
I'll see other pregnant women out and about and other women with kids and babies and it's so awkward. I mean, I'm not one to go out of my way to chit chat or say hello to complete strangers, in fact, I prefer to leave others alone and to be left alone myself because you know what- people can be weird and usually I'm the girl at the grocery store that the weirdo comes up to and engages in conversation... why? I don't know. Maybe I look friendly or I look like a sucker. I always think I look kind of bitchy! But I guess I look like a friendly B because it doesn't stop people from coming over and pushing my buttons. or pretending they don't see the big pregnant lady. Maybe it's because I have flaming red hair.... it's like a beacon. I must send off a signal or something that says... Hey you! Come on over here and push past me so that I almost topple over- or hey old lady- come on over here and cut in front of me in line and pretend you don't see my pregnant belly that's as BIG AS MOUNT EVEREST!
Can you imagine?! Old ladies are the WORST. THE WORST!!!! Hilarious- I used to be such an advocate for the elderly. Just love them to pieces. Loved them over children. Value them highly. Now it feels like every old person on the planet is on a mission to let me know that THEY are more important than me, they need to get in line first, they could care less that I am great with child, they are in more pain or suffering more than I am... and I find myself holding the door for EVERYBODY ELSE at the grocery store or being expected to let some old fart plow past me to get holy communion at church?! REALLY??? Thanks for almost knocking me over asshole.
Oh don't mind me. I'm just fed up. I was also very very calm about this whole labour and delivery thing and now I am just getting myself so worked up over it. Really. I was planning a drug free, natural vaginal birth... and now I'm thinking... what was I thinking?! I'll probably need something anyway because I might have an anxiety attack. Oh dear god. I'm scared. :( Really, really scared that the big day is almost here and I dind't think I would be afraid at all...I guess I'm kind of freaking out a bit about it over and I'm afriad I won't be able to calm myself down or stay centered when everything turns to chaos. I just don't know if I will be able to handle the pain and gruesomeness of what is around the corner. Plus it doesn't help that my husband is out of work STILL. and can NOT find a job for the life of us. AND there's no way in high heaven we'd be able to live on my salary alone. We can't do it. I guess you could say, I am terrified of what the future holds on many levels and I'm probably getting tired of playing the whole 'happy go lucky and everything will work out' charade.
I'm terribly worried about being at risk for post-partum depression because one of the cuases of it is finanical strain. So yeah- I guess being 9 months pregnant is going to really test my mettle. And labor and delivery?? Well - no pressure here but that's when I feel I'll really see what I'm made of. I've made it this far.... what's to stop me from going all the way.... I AM TITANIUM.
People are so rude.
Everybody either says or does something to drive me up a wall. I am constantly irritated. I'm even and especially irritated by OTHER MOMS!!! Really?? What the heck is THAT all about? I read posts about newly pregnant women who are 9 weeks along... NINE WEEKS!!! and they are complaining about this or that... or ouch this or ouch that and I'm like... ARE.... YOU...... KIDDING..... ME????!!!!!!
You are nine WEEKS pregnant- not nine MONTHS pregnant! OMG. It blows my mind. And who the heck am I to feel that way?? I was there once. To be fair- I've gone this entire pregnancy without much complaint and no reason to really complain. I still have no reason to REALLY complain... but now I just can't stand myself or more specifically - OTHER PEOPLE.
I'll see other pregnant women out and about and other women with kids and babies and it's so awkward. I mean, I'm not one to go out of my way to chit chat or say hello to complete strangers, in fact, I prefer to leave others alone and to be left alone myself because you know what- people can be weird and usually I'm the girl at the grocery store that the weirdo comes up to and engages in conversation... why? I don't know. Maybe I look friendly or I look like a sucker. I always think I look kind of bitchy! But I guess I look like a friendly B because it doesn't stop people from coming over and pushing my buttons. or pretending they don't see the big pregnant lady. Maybe it's because I have flaming red hair.... it's like a beacon. I must send off a signal or something that says... Hey you! Come on over here and push past me so that I almost topple over- or hey old lady- come on over here and cut in front of me in line and pretend you don't see my pregnant belly that's as BIG AS MOUNT EVEREST!
Can you imagine?! Old ladies are the WORST. THE WORST!!!! Hilarious- I used to be such an advocate for the elderly. Just love them to pieces. Loved them over children. Value them highly. Now it feels like every old person on the planet is on a mission to let me know that THEY are more important than me, they need to get in line first, they could care less that I am great with child, they are in more pain or suffering more than I am... and I find myself holding the door for EVERYBODY ELSE at the grocery store or being expected to let some old fart plow past me to get holy communion at church?! REALLY??? Thanks for almost knocking me over asshole.
Oh don't mind me. I'm just fed up. I was also very very calm about this whole labour and delivery thing and now I am just getting myself so worked up over it. Really. I was planning a drug free, natural vaginal birth... and now I'm thinking... what was I thinking?! I'll probably need something anyway because I might have an anxiety attack. Oh dear god. I'm scared. :( Really, really scared that the big day is almost here and I dind't think I would be afraid at all...I guess I'm kind of freaking out a bit about it over and I'm afriad I won't be able to calm myself down or stay centered when everything turns to chaos. I just don't know if I will be able to handle the pain and gruesomeness of what is around the corner. Plus it doesn't help that my husband is out of work STILL. and can NOT find a job for the life of us. AND there's no way in high heaven we'd be able to live on my salary alone. We can't do it. I guess you could say, I am terrified of what the future holds on many levels and I'm probably getting tired of playing the whole 'happy go lucky and everything will work out' charade.
I'm terribly worried about being at risk for post-partum depression because one of the cuases of it is finanical strain. So yeah- I guess being 9 months pregnant is going to really test my mettle. And labor and delivery?? Well - no pressure here but that's when I feel I'll really see what I'm made of. I've made it this far.... what's to stop me from going all the way.... I AM TITANIUM.
People are so rude.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Chidbrith Classes at the hospital are USELESS
There. I said it. I honestly feel like the childbirth classes at the hospital are USELESS. I read more and was more educated I feel than the instructors and certainly more than the other moms and dad who were there. These people are clueless. The instructors STINK. Of course I am biased because I am an instructor and I have expectations that most instructors will be very good. I specialize in teaching effectiveness at the university level so understandbly I am hard to please. But really people?? I'm getting charged $90 for 4 weeks of drivel that I had previously learned in 8th grade??? So disappointed. Doubly so, the crap they are teaching of course is laced with hype by the instructors to go all medical intervention all the way... they keep talking about how you'll need the epidural and how pitocin will be needed and how difficult it is to have baby latch on right after birth... and etc. etc. etc.. They put time limits on labour and delivery and you can pretty much guaruntee that you won't be in a squatting birth position for the delivery because you'll be 'too tired' ... why? Because the uninformed instructor was too tired herself 35 years ago? That means I will be? PUH LEASE.
Fed up with the hospital system. Fed up with being broke and not being able to afford a home birth. Fed up with the goverment for not making home births more affordable or covered by insurance companies. Kiss my ass world.
I just want a nice quiet uneventful home birth at a reasonable cost... ie: $100 copay please!!! lol.. that's not happening any time soon!
Fed up with the hospital system. Fed up with being broke and not being able to afford a home birth. Fed up with the goverment for not making home births more affordable or covered by insurance companies. Kiss my ass world.
I just want a nice quiet uneventful home birth at a reasonable cost... ie: $100 copay please!!! lol.. that's not happening any time soon!
Hiccups! Wow! Awww! Cute!!
Baby girl had her first hiccups (to my knowledge!) today! I ate a whole bag of popcorn for lunch (poor girl's free lunch at work) and the baby started to hiccup. From the popcorn? I think so. Yes. :) So cute. I think she is head down but I honestly can NOT tell the difference between her butt and her head! I always have a large hard object up over my belly button and under my rib cage which I am praying is her little butt... honestly though - it could be her head for all I know. :\ I can't tell! I've been trying to read belly mapping tools to figure out...
I'm pretty sure I have little flutters down by my lower pelvis - which could be her little hands and arms.. very fluttery and adorable... I like it! I read that might be her little arms and that means that she is head down and that she is facing the right way... terrific!
I wonder when she will drop and how I will know? Is she going to come 'on time' around September 19 or 22 or will she be 'late' around October 6? Hard to say! I just know that I love her sooooooo much!!!! I can't stand it!!! I can't wait for our little girl to get here. Hubby is sooo excited! He gets very emotional and is so loving and tender and eager to meet his little peanut!!!! Oh babie! You are so loved!!!! XOXOXOXXXX!!!!!!!
I'm pretty sure I have little flutters down by my lower pelvis - which could be her little hands and arms.. very fluttery and adorable... I like it! I read that might be her little arms and that means that she is head down and that she is facing the right way... terrific!
I wonder when she will drop and how I will know? Is she going to come 'on time' around September 19 or 22 or will she be 'late' around October 6? Hard to say! I just know that I love her sooooooo much!!!! I can't stand it!!! I can't wait for our little girl to get here. Hubby is sooo excited! He gets very emotional and is so loving and tender and eager to meet his little peanut!!!! Oh babie! You are so loved!!!! XOXOXOXXXX!!!!!!!
Monday, August 15, 2011
35 weeks today and I have to peeeee
Well at 35 weeks I am only now just starting to get up in the middle of the night (twice a night) to pee! Finally. I've read alot about peeing at night and feeling the need to pee during pregnancy but never expereineced it until now. That's a good sign! It means the baby is 'engaged' and her head is pressing on my bladder. Weeeee. :) Looks like I have to start gearing up for work in the morning a bit earlier than I have been because summer is over baby. School starts in two weeks so our office is getting back on track with the 9am start time. Ugh. :P Oh well- it was fun while it lasted!
We have our second to last pregnancy class tonight. That's exciting. Next week is our last class and we finally get to check out the maternity floor and delivery and recovery rooms.
We typed up an email to send to family laying out our expectations for during labor and delivery but we're both having second thoughts about sending it now... I guess we just needed to type it up to feel like we got some of our anxiety out. We will probably still send it out but at a later date and after maybe another revision or two. It's hard because we love our families so much but we also need to state our needs so that nobody has hurt feelings about being there at certain times when we would like to be alone with our baby.
Kind of feel like we shouldn't even have to state this stuff but sometimes people just don't get it and get wrapped up in what THEY want not in what's best for you. That's just the way of the world at times.
Feeling pretty good! Saw an excellent video of a Kardashian giving birth and she did it so easily and so quietly- it inspired me to do the same. One of my students told me to watch it and I did and I'm glad I did!
Our basement is stinky. Too much rain... too much mold.. ugh. I have so many phone calls to make - to get our cars inspected, to get our pond repaired, to have our roof repaired, to get the insurance guy to come see our basement that was finished and has since been flooded... water can really damage things and it looks like its going to keep raining all week. Terrific! Our house smells like old crotch and cat pee from the mildew and mold that is festering now in the damp basement. Wow! Timing is everything!! Of course it had to happen right now. My husband's unemployment is now officially over. That means there is no income coming in right now except for my job and we only have a couple hundred dollars in savings left to pay the mortgage for September. I don't know how we are going to do this. I really don't.
I believe in my heart of hearts (can I sound any more naive?) that he will get a call back on a job in the next week or two... But of course that means that he'll be starting a new job a week before I deliver---- so what does that mean??? There goes the mommy daddy and baby bonding time out the window... again with the timing. Unbelieveable.
Oh well- can't do much except go with the flow....
We have our second to last pregnancy class tonight. That's exciting. Next week is our last class and we finally get to check out the maternity floor and delivery and recovery rooms.
We typed up an email to send to family laying out our expectations for during labor and delivery but we're both having second thoughts about sending it now... I guess we just needed to type it up to feel like we got some of our anxiety out. We will probably still send it out but at a later date and after maybe another revision or two. It's hard because we love our families so much but we also need to state our needs so that nobody has hurt feelings about being there at certain times when we would like to be alone with our baby.
Kind of feel like we shouldn't even have to state this stuff but sometimes people just don't get it and get wrapped up in what THEY want not in what's best for you. That's just the way of the world at times.
Feeling pretty good! Saw an excellent video of a Kardashian giving birth and she did it so easily and so quietly- it inspired me to do the same. One of my students told me to watch it and I did and I'm glad I did!
Our basement is stinky. Too much rain... too much mold.. ugh. I have so many phone calls to make - to get our cars inspected, to get our pond repaired, to have our roof repaired, to get the insurance guy to come see our basement that was finished and has since been flooded... water can really damage things and it looks like its going to keep raining all week. Terrific! Our house smells like old crotch and cat pee from the mildew and mold that is festering now in the damp basement. Wow! Timing is everything!! Of course it had to happen right now. My husband's unemployment is now officially over. That means there is no income coming in right now except for my job and we only have a couple hundred dollars in savings left to pay the mortgage for September. I don't know how we are going to do this. I really don't.
I believe in my heart of hearts (can I sound any more naive?) that he will get a call back on a job in the next week or two... But of course that means that he'll be starting a new job a week before I deliver---- so what does that mean??? There goes the mommy daddy and baby bonding time out the window... again with the timing. Unbelieveable.
Oh well- can't do much except go with the flow....
Friday, August 5, 2011
NOW I have the Braxton Hicks... and measuring 35w at 334d!
So now I have what I can assume are Braxton Hicks! It feels like very very mild slight cramping in lower abdomen area/pelvic area. Lasts for maybe a few minutes once a day... mostly at night... no big whoop. But that's apparently what it is... Found out I was indeed just cat-stretching every morning because now I do it consciously and it feels GOOD... helps a lot.. my body is so cramped up when I have to sleep on my sides and I'm snoring like a snuffalufagus lately. OMG. I sound like a lawn mower!! I wake myself up! lol. Baby is SOOO active!!! She's a swimmer! Or a gymnast that's for sure!! She loves to twirl and topple about in there!
Weight gain has been zilcho today! I thought for sure I would have gained a few pounds... the last weigh in was 188... so hubs and I thought I'd be up to 192 today... nope... still at 188!! Weird... also weird is that baby is measuring up at 35 weeks today- and I'm only 33 weeks and 4 days along. She is a big baby or a long baby... taking after daddy already. :) So if I didn't gain weight but baby got bigger... must mean that I lost weight and baby gained it. I think.
Heartbeat was 150 - which was excellent.
BP was 130 over 60... that's a litte high for the upper number for me.. .I think that was operator error as the girl taking my BP was gabbing away and making me nervous. :P
Met with the midwives today and surprisingly they didn't put me at ease!! I thought for sure- I've waited so long to meet with them and talk about our natural birth options.. but they seemed more keen on reading over my birth plan and making ammendments to it telling me that pitocin might be necessary and episiotomies happen sometimes but they really don't like to do them unless it looks like you will have a big tear... great...
Now I'm getting nervous... I actually felt a LOT more comfortable with some of the doctors that we've met... lovely bunch they are... and my suspicions about who is more inclined to medical were spot on too.
well - at least we have a heads up.
Really the only thing I can do to help myself get in and out of there with as littel intervention as possible is to labor as long as I can at home!!!
Or come up with $1600 for a home birth... but with our current budget - the $100 copay makes more sense.... plus I should probaly give hospital birth a whirl so I have something to compare a home birth to (which I hope to have with our next one).
So nerve wracking... it's like you're damned if you and damned if you don't! Part of me wants a vaginal natural birth .. but the other part thinks a c-section would at least save my private parts from getting torn or stretched or cut... but that's such MAJOR surgery.. ugh! and that TERRIFIES me!!!
I don't know. I feel like it's starting to get out of control already. Really thought talking to the midwives would help me feel better today but honestly- it kind of made me feel more anxious.
The one midwife reminded me of a really weird nun... and she had a beard... and some weird splochy red marks on her arm.. the other one was nice but seemed to be drugged out and la la gooey eyed and too calm and relaxed and hippie like and she had a big thing on her face... What was I expecting? Maybe a sharp dressed youngish chick who looked like she had it together? Maybe someone who came across as an advocate for YOU not as a justifier of the inevitable...
I don't know. :\ Disappointed to say the least. Did not get that sense of security and 'we're in this together' that I was hoping for. I actually felt a lot better talking to the docs!!
Anyway- we brought in our birth plan and reviewed it with the midwives and they pretty much told us in so many words... some things can't be avoided... like pitocin and IV and epidural.. not cool. Don't want it.
Especially dont want the pitocin... they said if things were not progressing they'd have to do it... but if I was up and moving around and ambulatory in first phase of labour than it might not be necessary... whatever... stay away from me!!!
Pitocin leads to epidural and epidural leads to sleepy baby and sleepy baby leads to fetal distress which leads to c-section... NO THANKS.
Argh. It's big business - this business of being born... and then I also start to wonder... am I REALLY measuring bigger??? Or what if they exagerate a bit so that they try to induce me early.... GET LOST.
I don't want to meet with the midwives again. I want one of the two doctors that I really like... Dr. C and Dr. D.... thank you very much. =D
Weight gain has been zilcho today! I thought for sure I would have gained a few pounds... the last weigh in was 188... so hubs and I thought I'd be up to 192 today... nope... still at 188!! Weird... also weird is that baby is measuring up at 35 weeks today- and I'm only 33 weeks and 4 days along. She is a big baby or a long baby... taking after daddy already. :) So if I didn't gain weight but baby got bigger... must mean that I lost weight and baby gained it. I think.
Heartbeat was 150 - which was excellent.
BP was 130 over 60... that's a litte high for the upper number for me.. .I think that was operator error as the girl taking my BP was gabbing away and making me nervous. :P
Met with the midwives today and surprisingly they didn't put me at ease!! I thought for sure- I've waited so long to meet with them and talk about our natural birth options.. but they seemed more keen on reading over my birth plan and making ammendments to it telling me that pitocin might be necessary and episiotomies happen sometimes but they really don't like to do them unless it looks like you will have a big tear... great...
Now I'm getting nervous... I actually felt a LOT more comfortable with some of the doctors that we've met... lovely bunch they are... and my suspicions about who is more inclined to medical were spot on too.
well - at least we have a heads up.
Really the only thing I can do to help myself get in and out of there with as littel intervention as possible is to labor as long as I can at home!!!
Or come up with $1600 for a home birth... but with our current budget - the $100 copay makes more sense.... plus I should probaly give hospital birth a whirl so I have something to compare a home birth to (which I hope to have with our next one).
So nerve wracking... it's like you're damned if you and damned if you don't! Part of me wants a vaginal natural birth .. but the other part thinks a c-section would at least save my private parts from getting torn or stretched or cut... but that's such MAJOR surgery.. ugh! and that TERRIFIES me!!!
I don't know. I feel like it's starting to get out of control already. Really thought talking to the midwives would help me feel better today but honestly- it kind of made me feel more anxious.
The one midwife reminded me of a really weird nun... and she had a beard... and some weird splochy red marks on her arm.. the other one was nice but seemed to be drugged out and la la gooey eyed and too calm and relaxed and hippie like and she had a big thing on her face... What was I expecting? Maybe a sharp dressed youngish chick who looked like she had it together? Maybe someone who came across as an advocate for YOU not as a justifier of the inevitable...
I don't know. :\ Disappointed to say the least. Did not get that sense of security and 'we're in this together' that I was hoping for. I actually felt a lot better talking to the docs!!
Anyway- we brought in our birth plan and reviewed it with the midwives and they pretty much told us in so many words... some things can't be avoided... like pitocin and IV and epidural.. not cool. Don't want it.
Especially dont want the pitocin... they said if things were not progressing they'd have to do it... but if I was up and moving around and ambulatory in first phase of labour than it might not be necessary... whatever... stay away from me!!!
Pitocin leads to epidural and epidural leads to sleepy baby and sleepy baby leads to fetal distress which leads to c-section... NO THANKS.
Argh. It's big business - this business of being born... and then I also start to wonder... am I REALLY measuring bigger??? Or what if they exagerate a bit so that they try to induce me early.... GET LOST.
I don't want to meet with the midwives again. I want one of the two doctors that I really like... Dr. C and Dr. D.... thank you very much. =D
Saturday, July 30, 2011
It wasn't Braxton Hicks! Duhhhh...
Well, I finally figured out that it wasn't Braxton Hicks it was just me stretching my body like a cat in the morning! I finally realized because I kept trying to wake up when my body would reflex like that- apparently I just needed a good stretch! lol... so no BHC for me yet... =D
In other news- love being pregnant. But who-wee is it difficult to shower and toilet and put on shoes and all that stuff! Takes time to stay clean and sweet but it's worth it!! It's hot too- and I'm cranky every now and then.. mostly every now... hehe... trying to really work on being joyful and happy- it's so easy to get negative and bitchy.
In other news- love being pregnant. But who-wee is it difficult to shower and toilet and put on shoes and all that stuff! Takes time to stay clean and sweet but it's worth it!! It's hot too- and I'm cranky every now and then.. mostly every now... hehe... trying to really work on being joyful and happy- it's so easy to get negative and bitchy.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Braxton Hicks- Got two of them last night! 31 weeks 4 days
OMG! Wow. I guess I had what were Braxton Hicks contractions last night/this morning!!! FINALLY. And oh boy. I was sleeping on my side and in the middle of sleep I guess I was half awake or half asleep and trying to make sense of what was happening to me. In my mind, I thought that I was just doing a normal full body stretch (though why on earth would I be doing that as I haven't done a full body stretch in almost a year now) while laying on my side and when I was doing that (which I wasn't doing that physically- but in my head I must have thought this) my stomach tensed up BIG TIME for a few seconds!!! And woke me right up! I switched positions... and went back to sleep... again it happened a little while later while I was sleeping on my side or back I can't remember... but omg... again... ::clenches:: HRMMPPPPPPPPPPPCCHHHHH. ::panting panting:: just like that! Braxton Hicks. How about that!
They snuck up on me while I was sleeping! Well- there you go- it was just like when I had the lightening the first time at 17 weeks.... which again occured while I was sleeping. Your mind tries to rationalize what is happening to your body without your permission! lol... so I remember thinking oh- now what am I getting all anxious about that I am getting butterflies in my tummy? LOL! NOTHING!! It was lightening!
Anyway- let me tell you it is almost 7am and already 80 degrees here. Ugh! Trying to stay cool again today... and also- um... I think Braxton Hicks can be brought on by dehydration... so I am trying my darndest to stay hydrated today. Also- it's pretty exciting!
And weirdo dreams last night- big time!
They snuck up on me while I was sleeping! Well- there you go- it was just like when I had the lightening the first time at 17 weeks.... which again occured while I was sleeping. Your mind tries to rationalize what is happening to your body without your permission! lol... so I remember thinking oh- now what am I getting all anxious about that I am getting butterflies in my tummy? LOL! NOTHING!! It was lightening!
Anyway- let me tell you it is almost 7am and already 80 degrees here. Ugh! Trying to stay cool again today... and also- um... I think Braxton Hicks can be brought on by dehydration... so I am trying my darndest to stay hydrated today. Also- it's pretty exciting!
And weirdo dreams last night- big time!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
31 weeks?
So here we are... I think we are around 31 or 32 weeks... LOTS of baby movement! Non-stop! She's a little mover and I love it!!! I got over my cold last week after 3 or 4 days but the nasal congestion has stayed. Ugh. My feet have been hurting a bit if I stand on them for longer than an hour or two at a time my instep will swell up and I get charley horses in my hamstrings. Ouch! I'm out of shape! But overall- I am very pleased with my prgenant body! I look great! I really havent gained that much weight considering that I have been eating whatever I dang well please and certainly haven't been watching what I eat. I'm around 178lbs now... so I've gained about 28 lbs so far. My body looks pretty good! My face is kind of chubby now and I don't like that ... but pretty much look like I'm 'all baby' or at leats that is what everyone is telling me! lol. I love my pregnant tummy!
Tummy is getting in the way of sitting and standing and getting comfy sometimes but I don't mind at all. Hard to get comfy when sleeping... but no big deal. I take all this any day for this wonderful miracle of life!!!! XOXOX!!
Tummy is getting in the way of sitting and standing and getting comfy sometimes but I don't mind at all. Hard to get comfy when sleeping... but no big deal. I take all this any day for this wonderful miracle of life!!!! XOXOX!!
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
30 weeks along!
Wow. I am sick as a dog! I caught a terrible head cold the other day (yesterday or the day before- the 4th of July) and have been sneezing non-stop, headache, sore throat, itchy eyes, stuffy nose and runny nose. Body aches and pains... hard time sleeping... wahhh. I'm suffering terrible. It's 330am and I can't sleep. I'm hot. I'm cold. I can't take a dang thing for this cold. I'm drinking chamomile tea, sucking on ice pops, and eating fig newtons. Will probably take the day off from work tomorrow or at least work from home. My poor left foot is swelled up like a balloon.
I stood all day on July 2 for a birthday party I threw for my husband so I had a house full of 15 guests and was waiting on everyone all day... don't get me wrong... I wanted to... I was just stupid about it because by the end of the night. I couldn't walk! The next day I was hobbled over as well. My instep or my arch gets swollen up and my thighs felt like they had charley horses. It was awful. It's better now but my left arch is still swelled and red and it's diffult to walk or put pressure on. :(
Throat still hurts. Ouchie!
Not sure why some due date calculators are saying I am already 30 weeks along and the ones on my blog say I'm still 29 weeks and 2 days... it's odd... I guess I am a bnit further along than I thought because I look really really really big! Big and beautiful! But even people at work are like... I dont think you are going to make it til September 20! lol... my mom thinks the baby dropped already!? I was like.. uhm... no.
Found a doula! She is affordable at $400 - 200 is due at time of meeting adn the other 200 is due 2 weeks after birth... think we are going to go with her... the other option is another doula who charges 1000!!! what?! get going! at that rate you are better off getting a home birth for 1600... still.. wish we could afford the home birth but maybe for the next time around....
At any rate I am achey and sick and miserable. :( My head hurts. My neck hurts and I can't sleep (obviously). And apparently I am 30 weeks along!
I stood all day on July 2 for a birthday party I threw for my husband so I had a house full of 15 guests and was waiting on everyone all day... don't get me wrong... I wanted to... I was just stupid about it because by the end of the night. I couldn't walk! The next day I was hobbled over as well. My instep or my arch gets swollen up and my thighs felt like they had charley horses. It was awful. It's better now but my left arch is still swelled and red and it's diffult to walk or put pressure on. :(
Throat still hurts. Ouchie!
Not sure why some due date calculators are saying I am already 30 weeks along and the ones on my blog say I'm still 29 weeks and 2 days... it's odd... I guess I am a bnit further along than I thought because I look really really really big! Big and beautiful! But even people at work are like... I dont think you are going to make it til September 20! lol... my mom thinks the baby dropped already!? I was like.. uhm... no.
Found a doula! She is affordable at $400 - 200 is due at time of meeting adn the other 200 is due 2 weeks after birth... think we are going to go with her... the other option is another doula who charges 1000!!! what?! get going! at that rate you are better off getting a home birth for 1600... still.. wish we could afford the home birth but maybe for the next time around....
At any rate I am achey and sick and miserable. :( My head hurts. My neck hurts and I can't sleep (obviously). And apparently I am 30 weeks along!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
27 weeks and 1 day or 26 weeks and 5 days??!
There's some dispute on my days along... My LMP was Dec. 13, 2010.... however I ovulated on Day 17 which would put me three days ahead of the normal LMP formula... so based on my LMP I am due 9/19/2011... but going by the fact that I ovulated three days later than day 14... that puts me at 9/22/2011... my U/S said I was due 9/20/2011... so it's really up in the air how far along I am...
Today they measured me at 28 weeks. According to the hospital chart and my LMP I am 27 weeks and 1 day and that means that every Monday I turn a new week...
According to ME and my ovulatory info... I put myself at due date 9/22 and am currently 26 weeks and 5 days... with every Thursday I turn a new week... so we are about 4 days off... which is ALOT that's like a week off.
Hmmm... well... I don't know what to say! lol. I guess I'll go by their records?
Today they measured me at 28 weeks. According to the hospital chart and my LMP I am 27 weeks and 1 day and that means that every Monday I turn a new week...
According to ME and my ovulatory info... I put myself at due date 9/22 and am currently 26 weeks and 5 days... with every Thursday I turn a new week... so we are about 4 days off... which is ALOT that's like a week off.
Hmmm... well... I don't know what to say! lol. I guess I'll go by their records?
Monday, June 20, 2011
26 weeks 4 days
Lane Cardinal here reporting for duty! All systems go. Baby is a kicking machine! lol. Love it!! Our pool filter neighbors have been accomodating. My dh actually went over there one night and just pulled the plug on their pool and texted them to tell them he unplugged it because it was too loud and it was keeping his wife up at night. So they were like leave it unplugged- we are gone for the weekend. Sorry about that we will have it checked. Anyway- now they only run it from 3-6pm so I am a happy happy girl! I can live with that! :)
In other news I feel great and never looked better. I love being pregnant and its going by very quickly!! On the jobfront hubbie has an interview this week sometime with a big corp so that is very promising!!! Very exciting! :) Keeping fingers crossed and trying to stay calm and carry on. :)
In other news I feel great and never looked better. I love being pregnant and its going by very quickly!! On the jobfront hubbie has an interview this week sometime with a big corp so that is very promising!!! Very exciting! :) Keeping fingers crossed and trying to stay calm and carry on. :)
Friday, June 17, 2011
26 weeks and 1 day
Hello world! 26 weeks and 1 day today! Let's see Ive been feeling pretty good lately! :) No complaints. A little bit of nausea last night and last week too but could be from not drinking enough water or something I ate. I've been really trying to stay hydrated. Oh how I wish you could see how lovely it is outside today! It is simply breathtaking. The birds and animals are all out! It's 8am and its quiet and lovely here in the paradise of our backyard on our deck. Our neighbor's pool filter has been tdriving me INSANE but my dh went over last night and unplugged it so we could get some sleep. They leave that thing running for 16 hours a day!!! It's never wracking. Can never get any peace and quiet and just enjoy the sounds of nature because of that stupid pool filter which is pointed RIGHT AT our yard and is right up against the property line. I hate it. I hope the damn thing blows up and they get rid of it. THey never even use their pool! They let that filter run thru the night and everything! They aren't even here on the weekends!! It's unbelievable. I don't even know if they are home right now or not but I don't care. I'm enjoying quiet beautiful time on my deck.
Anyway- that is neither here nor there. We have some baby birds that just hatched in a hanging flower basket on our deck too! Little robins. Oh my lord they are precious. Little tiny feathery quivering things! Sooo cute! Right outside our baby girl's window!!! This place is beaming with fertility! lol.
My back is killing me. Can't get comfy at night. I desperately want a pregnancy pillow but we dont have 100 dollars to spend on one so my dh has been tucking me in with blankets and pillows and supporting my back every night. It certainly helps. I just have to go with the flow.
I love our little house. But alas, it seems it may be too little to contain us all at once! We had to move our dresser out of the baby's room because there isn't enough room. Now we have to find another spot for it.. maybe in the basement? We'll see... or we could sell it. But don't really want to do that as it goes with the set and it is really quite beautiful furniture- though it is very big - a bit big for our tiny home. Oh well.
It's Friday!! YEAY!!! TGIF!!! Hope today goes quickly at work.. meaning I hope my boss doesn't show up and if he does- I hope he is in and out rather quickly!
I also hope our neighbors wise the heck up and knock it off with this freaking pool filter business. It's really beyond the point of tolerance. I can't even sit on my deck and have dinner with friends or just enjoy some twilight tea with my husband. OF COURSE it doesnt affect our neighbors. They have the damn pool posiitioned away from their house and pointed directly at ours!! Unreal. Inconsiderate morons. But you know I love them to pieces. They are good people otherwise as far as I can tell. I just wish they were more considerate of others... Heck I wish evyerbody was more considerate of others... don't get me started on immediate family members... ew. Anyway. Tootles! :) XOX
Anyway- that is neither here nor there. We have some baby birds that just hatched in a hanging flower basket on our deck too! Little robins. Oh my lord they are precious. Little tiny feathery quivering things! Sooo cute! Right outside our baby girl's window!!! This place is beaming with fertility! lol.
My back is killing me. Can't get comfy at night. I desperately want a pregnancy pillow but we dont have 100 dollars to spend on one so my dh has been tucking me in with blankets and pillows and supporting my back every night. It certainly helps. I just have to go with the flow.
I love our little house. But alas, it seems it may be too little to contain us all at once! We had to move our dresser out of the baby's room because there isn't enough room. Now we have to find another spot for it.. maybe in the basement? We'll see... or we could sell it. But don't really want to do that as it goes with the set and it is really quite beautiful furniture- though it is very big - a bit big for our tiny home. Oh well.
It's Friday!! YEAY!!! TGIF!!! Hope today goes quickly at work.. meaning I hope my boss doesn't show up and if he does- I hope he is in and out rather quickly!
I also hope our neighbors wise the heck up and knock it off with this freaking pool filter business. It's really beyond the point of tolerance. I can't even sit on my deck and have dinner with friends or just enjoy some twilight tea with my husband. OF COURSE it doesnt affect our neighbors. They have the damn pool posiitioned away from their house and pointed directly at ours!! Unreal. Inconsiderate morons. But you know I love them to pieces. They are good people otherwise as far as I can tell. I just wish they were more considerate of others... Heck I wish evyerbody was more considerate of others... don't get me started on immediate family members... ew. Anyway. Tootles! :) XOX
Saturday, June 11, 2011
25 weeks 2 days and feel ILL
Ugh. Dont know if it was something I ate? Bad keilbasa that my FIL brought over??? Or the farm we visited today that had lambs and goats and cats and roosters at it?? Didn't touch anything and washed my hands after petting a cat's head... or what?? Maybe because I have been constipated the past few days?? I feel like HELL. Sick to my stomach and nauseated. Feel very full and my belly is HUGE. I walked around the house a bit and tried to go to the bathroom and passed a few small BMs... but nothing major... I still feel queasy.. maybe I should have taken my B vitamins with my prenatal this morning... havent taken the B vitamins in a few days.. they smell bad... but maybe that why I feel sicky now? Who knows.. UGH!!!! This sucks. Feel AWFUL.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
25 weeks today and its 95 degrees out!!
Wow! It's a hot one!!! Holy smokes. The heat is intense and it can wipe you out pretty quickly. Went swimming at mom's yesterday and the 82 degree pool water was FREEZING! LOL... either too hot outside or the water it too cold! It was nice though. Even just a half hour in the pool was enough to cool your interal core temp down enough to withstand the sweltering heat. It ws 96 degrees even at 8pm last night. Ugh. Turned on the AC last night so we could breathe in the house. Keeping fingers crossed that the AC lasts us through the summer! I feel good otherwise. No complaints. Baby likes to kick up a storm all the time and it's cute. I am measuring at 24inches right where I am supposed to be so that is cool. It's 8am and I guess I better get ready to head into work soon but I am so big and feel so full and akward it's hard to move around much at the house. Wee. :)
Saturday, June 4, 2011
24 weeks 2 days and feeling YUCKY!! back from babymoon
We had an AMAZING babymoon this past week at the beach! IT WAS Awesome!!!! On the downside when we got back to thehouse it was much colder here and I got some kind of stomach bug because yesterday I was EXHAUSTED and felt sick and just awful. :( Feeling a little better today after resting all day. Major heartburn on a daily basis and insomnia like mad... it's not fun. :( but love to feel the baby kicking up a storm and I'm so happy to be pregnant even though I am suffering and in pain.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
23 weeks along and gained 17 lbs and a whole lot of kicks!!
I am 23 weeks today! Wow~ FUN!!! Loving it!!! I look SOOOO pregnant! Now people are noticing and asking me when I am due. I do want to control the weight gain going forward to make sure our little baby isn't born too big and to make sure I don't get diabetes or high blood pressure...
My stats pre-pregnancy:
weight = 150
hips = 41.5
waist = 29
chest = 38
thigh = 23.5
My stats now:
weight= 167
hips = 43
waist= 35
belly= 39
chest = 42
thigh = 26
Feeling lots of kicks and movement now. Love it! So precious!!! Feel great! I do feel heavy and feel like I am moving slower. It is hard to put on underwear and socks and shoes and forget about painting your toes. But other than that I have no complaints at all. I feel wonderful and love being a mom and being pregnant!
My stats pre-pregnancy:
weight = 150
hips = 41.5
waist = 29
chest = 38
thigh = 23.5
My stats now:
weight= 167
hips = 43
waist= 35
belly= 39
chest = 42
thigh = 26
Feeling lots of kicks and movement now. Love it! So precious!!! Feel great! I do feel heavy and feel like I am moving slower. It is hard to put on underwear and socks and shoes and forget about painting your toes. But other than that I have no complaints at all. I feel wonderful and love being a mom and being pregnant!
Monday, May 23, 2011
22 weeks 4 days... im a big girl!!
Wow. So I should let y'all know I am pretty big right now. I just weighed myself and I'm clocking in at 169lbs. Hellooo.. That's HUGE. I was just 165 about a week ago. So that's not good. On May 13 visit I weighed 165... THIS MORNING I also weighed 165... but just now before bed I weighed 169... uhm.... I should not be gaining like 5 pounds a week ok?
My mom and husband have been on my case to seriously start eating better and cut the junk out. It's true. I've been inhaling everything like a trash compactor. Not good. I mean dont get me wrong I've been eating lots and lots of organic stuff... but also not holding back on the junk food and fast food either. Dumb. Sorry but your body wants what it wants when its pregnant! Still- I should know better. Big time. As of right now, I am going to make smarter choices going forward. I mean I am not even 23 weeks and I've already gained alomost 20lbs?! That's not cool. The max I should gain for this pregnancy is 25-30 and I've still got 17 weeks to go! At this rate I'll be up to 200lbs by the time I deliver. Not happening. Not on my watch.
We've started walking every other day for an hour... about 3 miles... that's good. It's tough on me but lets face it- I need it. I can't believe how much I weigh and I am BIG... I was looking at pics of me from three months pregnant and I was little! Maybe around 150 or 152... here I am at a little over 5 months and I am 170?! I am HUGE... HUGE. Big Girl. Mostly all in my tummy but I can see the backs of my legs look sloppy and my face has like 5 chins instead of the usual 3. lol..... great.
Anyway- better eating on the way.. .more fruit and veg. Less junk and crap. No more soda. Only water. No ice cream every night. No more fast food. That's it. Come on Laney!!!! Get with it!!!!
And I need to drink more water too!
My mom and husband have been on my case to seriously start eating better and cut the junk out. It's true. I've been inhaling everything like a trash compactor. Not good. I mean dont get me wrong I've been eating lots and lots of organic stuff... but also not holding back on the junk food and fast food either. Dumb. Sorry but your body wants what it wants when its pregnant! Still- I should know better. Big time. As of right now, I am going to make smarter choices going forward. I mean I am not even 23 weeks and I've already gained alomost 20lbs?! That's not cool. The max I should gain for this pregnancy is 25-30 and I've still got 17 weeks to go! At this rate I'll be up to 200lbs by the time I deliver. Not happening. Not on my watch.
We've started walking every other day for an hour... about 3 miles... that's good. It's tough on me but lets face it- I need it. I can't believe how much I weigh and I am BIG... I was looking at pics of me from three months pregnant and I was little! Maybe around 150 or 152... here I am at a little over 5 months and I am 170?! I am HUGE... HUGE. Big Girl. Mostly all in my tummy but I can see the backs of my legs look sloppy and my face has like 5 chins instead of the usual 3. lol..... great.
Anyway- better eating on the way.. .more fruit and veg. Less junk and crap. No more soda. Only water. No ice cream every night. No more fast food. That's it. Come on Laney!!!! Get with it!!!!
And I need to drink more water too!
Friday, May 20, 2011
22 weeks and feeling fab!
Wow! Here I am at 22 weeks. Feel great! Look great! Loving this! I've gained about 13-15lbs so far (which puts me near 163-165) not bad. I'll probably tip out around 185 (but hopefully less!) Still that will make an impressive weightloss story for sure! and I'll have a little darlin to show for it! WORTH IT! Baby is moving a lot lately and kicking up a storm - kicky Marie! So cute! The weather here has been so gross. It's been raining, raining, raining, for months!! This is rediculous!! The rainiest year ever. Here we are in the middle of May and it's been raining since March! Before that it was snow, snow, snow... not that I'm complaining but jeewiz a litte sunshine would be FABULOUS!
I've been having crappy dreams lately too. Wonder if they are stress related. They are. Money related. Stress related... Work related... disturbing and I hate them. Also am hearing the bristol hum again! Noooooes! LOL. That sucks. I can usually only hear it during the winter months when the ground is frozen. It's mechanical... it has a cadence to it. I think I'm the only person in neighborhood who can hear it though. Grand. Crazy lady! But it's there- either from gas drilling, farm equipment, the sewer system pumps, we also live near a water company tower.. who knows... All I know is that it's been dormant for several weeks (due to the ground defrosting) and then last night and the night before I can hear it loud and clear. So annoying. I just want to get a good night's sleep!
Sleeping is difficult. I cant sleep on my sides- even when I was thinner- the weight of my body crushes me. The fleshy part of my outter thighs hurts like mad. It feels bruised when I wake up. And my ear feels crushed too. My hubby folded up and put two comforters down on my spot so I can get some extra cushion when I sleep.. it helped the first night.. but not helping now. :( I'd like to try a feather bed or a memory foam mattress but you're talking $$$ for something like that... and a girl has her priorities... coach diaper bag... hellloo!! lol. I can suffer through the aches and pains... gimme my coach!
Well now that I am officially 'obese' at 165 and 5'3 I can tell you this. I have a LOT more sympathy for overweight people now that I am one. Grant it, yes, I am pregnant- and the weight gain I have is not because I am over eating or not exercising - I am growing a human being inside of me. Still- it's not easy to move around or bend over... forget about putting on underpants or socks... what a chore that is! My tummy gets in the way big time. I can't breathe most of the time I am huffing and puffing when I walk or sit. lol... it's a hard time for sure and I'm not even THAT big or THAT overweight. A few pounds makes a difference though. I miss being light on my feet. I'll tell you what- when I lose this baby weight- I'm not going to take for granted the joy of being thin and light again. 132 (or 126) here I come! I want to run again! I want to ride bikes! And I know my little toddler will keep me light and fit and on my feet!
I'm also having a lot of anxiety about leaving my job while on maternity leave and even MORE anxiety about whether or not to come back or take a year or two off. Hubby is applying for jobs in management so that will give us enough to live on when he secures something. Still, I like to be productive and I get competitive and I like to show something for my work and I like to be super woman too! Not a good combo. Raising a baby is going to be a lot of work from what I hear... just can't wrap my head around that yet. We'll see what happenens.... in the meantime, time for me to pray and meditate ... and oh yeah... I should get ready for work! LATE!!
I've been having crappy dreams lately too. Wonder if they are stress related. They are. Money related. Stress related... Work related... disturbing and I hate them. Also am hearing the bristol hum again! Noooooes! LOL. That sucks. I can usually only hear it during the winter months when the ground is frozen. It's mechanical... it has a cadence to it. I think I'm the only person in neighborhood who can hear it though. Grand. Crazy lady! But it's there- either from gas drilling, farm equipment, the sewer system pumps, we also live near a water company tower.. who knows... All I know is that it's been dormant for several weeks (due to the ground defrosting) and then last night and the night before I can hear it loud and clear. So annoying. I just want to get a good night's sleep!
Sleeping is difficult. I cant sleep on my sides- even when I was thinner- the weight of my body crushes me. The fleshy part of my outter thighs hurts like mad. It feels bruised when I wake up. And my ear feels crushed too. My hubby folded up and put two comforters down on my spot so I can get some extra cushion when I sleep.. it helped the first night.. but not helping now. :( I'd like to try a feather bed or a memory foam mattress but you're talking $$$ for something like that... and a girl has her priorities... coach diaper bag... hellloo!! lol. I can suffer through the aches and pains... gimme my coach!
Well now that I am officially 'obese' at 165 and 5'3 I can tell you this. I have a LOT more sympathy for overweight people now that I am one. Grant it, yes, I am pregnant- and the weight gain I have is not because I am over eating or not exercising - I am growing a human being inside of me. Still- it's not easy to move around or bend over... forget about putting on underpants or socks... what a chore that is! My tummy gets in the way big time. I can't breathe most of the time I am huffing and puffing when I walk or sit. lol... it's a hard time for sure and I'm not even THAT big or THAT overweight. A few pounds makes a difference though. I miss being light on my feet. I'll tell you what- when I lose this baby weight- I'm not going to take for granted the joy of being thin and light again. 132 (or 126) here I come! I want to run again! I want to ride bikes! And I know my little toddler will keep me light and fit and on my feet!
I'm also having a lot of anxiety about leaving my job while on maternity leave and even MORE anxiety about whether or not to come back or take a year or two off. Hubby is applying for jobs in management so that will give us enough to live on when he secures something. Still, I like to be productive and I get competitive and I like to show something for my work and I like to be super woman too! Not a good combo. Raising a baby is going to be a lot of work from what I hear... just can't wrap my head around that yet. We'll see what happenens.... in the meantime, time for me to pray and meditate ... and oh yeah... I should get ready for work! LATE!!
Friday, May 13, 2011
21 weeks and feeling great!
Well- I flew! Took a trip to the midwest and had no problems with flying at all. People could care less that you are pregnant however. They do not give you special treatment or treat you like a pregnant princess or queen bee at all.. you do NOT get special cuts in line at the ladies room, nor do men or women hold the door for you or help you with your luggage. Nope. People are pricks. As soon as they see you are pregnant they go out of their way to pretend they didn't see you at all. Thanks America. You're all heart! :P Ugh!
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Crib is UP!
My brother came over today and helped us pick up our crib. Hubby put it together tonight and it is GORGEOUS and PERFECT!!!! So exciting!!! LOVE IT!!!!
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
19 weeks today! Due date is now 9/22/2011...we'll see!
My EDD keeps fluctuating between 9/19 and 9/22... at our last ultrasound appointment I was supposed to be 18 weeks 3 days but I measured 18 weeks exactly...which puts me right at exactly 9/22 for an EDD... which is what I always thought it would be because even though my LMP was 12/13/2010 I don't have a 14 day ovulatory cycle. I ovulated on day 17 (12/16/2010). So that measures just about perfectly for me!
We found out we are having a baby girl! Yes!!! So excited!! So, so, sooo excited!!! Some women wait forever to have a girl.. some women never get to have girls. We're having a girl!!! YEAYYY!!!!
I feel pretty good. No complaints. Minor light stretching of uterus at times. Lots of cm. Yuk. But feel great otherwise. I do feel BIG. It's hard to walk and now that the weather is warmer my thighs are rubbing together. Ouch! No complaints though!
I guess I need new sneakers. I wore a pair for a walk the other day and when we got back my right arch was so tender and sore and my left knee felt the same. Oww!
We found out we are having a baby girl! Yes!!! So excited!! So, so, sooo excited!!! Some women wait forever to have a girl.. some women never get to have girls. We're having a girl!!! YEAYYY!!!!
I feel pretty good. No complaints. Minor light stretching of uterus at times. Lots of cm. Yuk. But feel great otherwise. I do feel BIG. It's hard to walk and now that the weather is warmer my thighs are rubbing together. Ouch! No complaints though!
I guess I need new sneakers. I wore a pair for a walk the other day and when we got back my right arch was so tender and sore and my left knee felt the same. Oww!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
17 weeks 2 days.... definitely FELT A KICK TODAY!!!
Ok- well I was lying in bed this morning (on my back! whoopsie) and I've been trying to lie on my left side like everyone tells you to. Well I rolled over onto my back at some point. Baby didn't like that and I could tell because I got the ol' kicky kicky in the tummy!!!!!! I definitely felt movement this morning!!! It was exactly like getting butterflies in your tummy!! At first I thought- oh I must just be nervous or making myself nervous about telling people at work today but then I realized... Uhm I get myself worked up and nervous A LOT and I have NEVER given myself butterflies! lol!! It was the babie!!!!! WOW!!!! Neato!!! Hope I can repeat that performance again soon!
It felt like butterflies... like your stomach was dipping when you go on a roller coaster.
It felt like butterflies... like your stomach was dipping when you go on a roller coaster.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Felt the baby move today! I think? 17 weeks 1 day
Well- couple of milestones today! Dh and I were all snuggled up and I could have sworn I felt a little flutter. I could be wrong. But I think I did!
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Remember life before kids? Boooorrrinnnggggg!
I wanted to do a blog post today to remind myself when I am a new mommie- how lucky I am to be a mom! Here I am almost 5 months pregnant (17 weeks tomororw!) and I have all the free time in the world. I have lots of quiet time (which I love) and can nap, sleep, play, bop, clean, shop, cook, read, dance, and do whatever I want, whenever I want! It's great! But... it's also pretty boring. :) I snuggled in bed with my hubby today and realized how much FUN it will be to have our own little snuggler between us to play little games with while we doze off for another Saturday morning snooze. My husband is the pen-ultimate cuddler! How glorious to have our own little friend to snuggle in with and make breakfast for and go have adventures with! I can't wait. So this is just a reminder to myself that while all this free time and do whatever you want time is abounding... it's also a little predictable, a little mundane, and a little insignificant. Remember that momma Laney when you are chasing around a toddler and trying to breastfeed a newborn!
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Belly Button! Yipe! What happened to you?
Oh my goodness! I was sitting on the sofa yesterday and after my hubby was careessing and singing to my tummy and kissing my little belly button he said - hey! you know how I always say I can never see the bottom of your belly button? Well there it is! I said what?! And when I looked - there it was! LOL! OMG! My belly button is expanding and pushing out! I can actually see the bottom of it. What a riot. That kind of made it hit home that yes- there is a little baby in there and yes- my body is actually changing! Holy smokes!! Wow! Well- there ya go! Feeling great over here!
Some stress at work because there's a lot of talk about promotions and not getting them and my co-worker and I have been barking up the same tree for a promotion for two years with no avail. She's really getting wacky about trying to promoter HERSELF whereas I try to advocate for both of us. Oh well... you get what you have coming to you is the truth... if she wants to go put her self out there and leave me in the dust- f- her. That's something that will probably bite her in the arse down the road anyway... Me? I could never do that. I am all for girl-power in the work world and sticking together. We both have the same job and she's been there 1 year longer than me but I have about 12 years of other experience on her. So it evens out and even works more in my favor if you ask me. I could care less. That place is so drama I want nothing to do with it anymore. Take your shitty promotion with no pay increase and stick it in your ear. I'm leaving after maternity leave anyway (if I can!) and then I will have a wonderful hard time trying to find a job with a toddler if I need to. Yeah. Can't wait for that! Not.
I am putting the intention out there that I get a promotion (at least a title change into a higher position). It might be at my current work place it might be at a future workplace- either way- I'm putting in my time until January and getting my 5 years in and then I'm out. Sounds good to me... If I can keep working there in some capacity that would be great too but only if it jives with my baby and my hubby and my schedule.
Well- better go dry my hair (I really need a haircut!!!) and get ready for work. Weeee!
Sun is out today!! YES!!!!
Some stress at work because there's a lot of talk about promotions and not getting them and my co-worker and I have been barking up the same tree for a promotion for two years with no avail. She's really getting wacky about trying to promoter HERSELF whereas I try to advocate for both of us. Oh well... you get what you have coming to you is the truth... if she wants to go put her self out there and leave me in the dust- f- her. That's something that will probably bite her in the arse down the road anyway... Me? I could never do that. I am all for girl-power in the work world and sticking together. We both have the same job and she's been there 1 year longer than me but I have about 12 years of other experience on her. So it evens out and even works more in my favor if you ask me. I could care less. That place is so drama I want nothing to do with it anymore. Take your shitty promotion with no pay increase and stick it in your ear. I'm leaving after maternity leave anyway (if I can!) and then I will have a wonderful hard time trying to find a job with a toddler if I need to. Yeah. Can't wait for that! Not.
I am putting the intention out there that I get a promotion (at least a title change into a higher position). It might be at my current work place it might be at a future workplace- either way- I'm putting in my time until January and getting my 5 years in and then I'm out. Sounds good to me... If I can keep working there in some capacity that would be great too but only if it jives with my baby and my hubby and my schedule.
Well- better go dry my hair (I really need a haircut!!!) and get ready for work. Weeee!
Sun is out today!! YES!!!!
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Give a little respect.... tooooo meeee...
My little baby bean is 16 weeks old as of yesterday! 16 weeks and 1 day today!!! What a gorgeous and amazing little baby we have! This week he will be able to hear me sing and talk!! So I have been singing Erasuer's song A little Respect because we were watching a Scrubs episode on Netflix the other day and they played this song in the OR. Of course I am all over it right now! lol... I feel great! No complaints! A little tired but otherwise feel wonderful. I had a major headache the other day that lasted the entire day so I took 2 tylenol... which I think helped with some relief... but other than that I feel fabulous!! I finally told my MIL it was OK to tell other people and I told my coworker that it has to be asecret between her and me... she is very good about keeping mum though she pretty much guessed I was pregnant and said our other corowrker girlfriend asked her if I was because she thought I might be too (its not like they dont know we were trying). It's so gloomy out! Yuk!
Have a wonderful day today and I am so thrilled! I can't wait for our next doc visit next Tuesday and then we find out the sex of our baby and and u's on April 29- CANT WAIT!!!!
Weee!!
Have a wonderful day today and I am so thrilled! I can't wait for our next doc visit next Tuesday and then we find out the sex of our baby and and u's on April 29- CANT WAIT!!!!
Weee!!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Happy 15 weeks today!
Today I am officially 15 weeks along and feeling fine! Baby is well. And we are too. I am however, still quite exhausted. Funny as my dh just stated 'isn't the second trimester supposed to be a lot better?' maybe! But so far... I'm as freaking pooped as ever!!! I'm so dang tired all the time. I feel like I could collapse. Maybe for hubby who has been out of work for the past year and gets to stay home all day living the life of Reilly- maybe he feels great.. but not me! I have an easy job for sure but still work 40 hours a week nonetheless where I have to be mentally alert and then on top of it I've added another teaching gig on from 6-10pm on some weeknights... plus there is a 2 hour commute added to that.. (1 hour going and 1 hour coming home)... So I'm working 8-430 every day and then adding a 6-10 once a week night class. I'm freaking TIRED. I feel exhausted and worn down. :( I wish I felt better. I'm also a little aggitated with the current state of things and extreme uncertainty about the future. I have a lot of stress because my husband is unemployed and I have big student loan payments kicking back in come June and there's all this fantasy talk of me staying home with the baby. Yeah right! While we live on my husband's nonexistent or barely existent job if he gets one? Max he can make is around 24K if we are LUCKY. Right now I am pulling in 35K and he is still getting about 1,000 a month on unemployment which barely covers our 1200/month mortgage. I'm scared. Im aggitated. It feels hopeless. Add to the mix that my crazy father in law is driving me up a g-damn wall I want to scream. We need financial help BIG TIME - we are drowning in debt and now will have another mouth to feed and unfortunately we are in a position where my husband can't provide the necessary $$$ we need to live even a modest life. Barring a miracle where he gets some kind of miraculous deal with selling his art... we are screwed before we even start the game. This sucks. Shit.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
14 weeks 2 days and doing great!
Here I am at 14w2d and feeling fabulous! I'm still a little fatigued. It's unusal for me to feel so wiped out. I have to remind myself that hellooo I am making a person over here! lol. But it's hard to comprehend that even now after seeing 3 ultrasounds. I have only gained 3lbs so far so that's good. I feel like I should probably watch what I eat. I don't think I should be gaining much more than 15lbs total or 20lbs if I can help it. I'm a little heavy to begin with. I was at my heaviest ever (dang it) when I got pregnant. 148lbs and 5'3 - I looked great but I could definately stand to slim down by about 10-12lbs. So here I am at 14 weeks my tummy is sticking WAYYY out! But I've only gained 3lbs? Isn't that odd! I am totally showing and its getting harder and harder to hide it at work. It's so funny this time around. Every other time I was pregnant (and subsequently m/c) I was shouting from the rooftops and telling everyone and anyone! Now I am so hestitant and protective of my little secret. It's almost like I don't want people to know because I wouldn't go parading my kid around online or around our neighborhood for all the strangers in the world to see! So why would I do that now?
I certainly don't like to get any lip from anyone and I'm not one for unsolicited advice that's for sure. I will enjoy these last few weeks of quiet time as much as possible. I figure around week 20 or so I should let people know at work. I'll know the sex of the baby by then too. My next prenatal is April 11 then next u/s is April 30 ... that's when we should know if we are having a boy or a girl. I will be very surprised if it is not a boy. I am totally convinced that it is! Both my husband and I had dreams that we had a girl.. so its definitely going to be a boy! lol. Also, based on my age and the month I conceived according to Chinese calendar its a boy and based on when we bd and when I ovulated - it's a boy. So if it's a girl- that will be a big shocker!
No aches or pains lately. Just a little pulling and tugging behind belly button here and there. Some shooting pains in the vagina once in a while but hardly ever. No pains otherwise! I really need to do some butt and thigh toning NOW to help make sure I don't get a rear end the size of the Chrysler building after birth. We were doing good with going on daily walks but its just so cold and snowy out still I dont want to go out there and I feel very lazy lately too.
I wolfed down about 8 pickles this morning and washed them down with pickle juice. Ew. So gross I know but I am CRAVING the salt. I usually go nutty with the olives and chips... but we are out of everything so the pickles had to do! Of course my body is craving junk junk junk. I ate two bean burritos yesterday and I love cheeseburgers and hashbrowns and all that other garbage. 80% of the time I am eating all organic foods. Dairy, meat, eggs, veggies, fruits are all organic. But I still eat ice cream and potato bread and pasta and hit the fast food joints a couple times a week. Isn't that terrible. :( I need to get a handle on that. It's like I don't want the healthy food all the time. I want soft, sugary, salty comfort food. Ugh. :P
Just ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich. OMG it was so good. And time for a little taste of ice cream before I take a nap. What a little piggie. Today this ends. Promise. For real. I mean it this time!
I certainly don't like to get any lip from anyone and I'm not one for unsolicited advice that's for sure. I will enjoy these last few weeks of quiet time as much as possible. I figure around week 20 or so I should let people know at work. I'll know the sex of the baby by then too. My next prenatal is April 11 then next u/s is April 30 ... that's when we should know if we are having a boy or a girl. I will be very surprised if it is not a boy. I am totally convinced that it is! Both my husband and I had dreams that we had a girl.. so its definitely going to be a boy! lol. Also, based on my age and the month I conceived according to Chinese calendar its a boy and based on when we bd and when I ovulated - it's a boy. So if it's a girl- that will be a big shocker!
No aches or pains lately. Just a little pulling and tugging behind belly button here and there. Some shooting pains in the vagina once in a while but hardly ever. No pains otherwise! I really need to do some butt and thigh toning NOW to help make sure I don't get a rear end the size of the Chrysler building after birth. We were doing good with going on daily walks but its just so cold and snowy out still I dont want to go out there and I feel very lazy lately too.
I wolfed down about 8 pickles this morning and washed them down with pickle juice. Ew. So gross I know but I am CRAVING the salt. I usually go nutty with the olives and chips... but we are out of everything so the pickles had to do! Of course my body is craving junk junk junk. I ate two bean burritos yesterday and I love cheeseburgers and hashbrowns and all that other garbage. 80% of the time I am eating all organic foods. Dairy, meat, eggs, veggies, fruits are all organic. But I still eat ice cream and potato bread and pasta and hit the fast food joints a couple times a week. Isn't that terrible. :( I need to get a handle on that. It's like I don't want the healthy food all the time. I want soft, sugary, salty comfort food. Ugh. :P
Just ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich. OMG it was so good. And time for a little taste of ice cream before I take a nap. What a little piggie. Today this ends. Promise. For real. I mean it this time!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Lots of rest today!
We had a big day yesterday out and about and walking a lot... so today we stayed in and sat around like big veggies! lol... a good day full of rest and relaxation and chinese food. Yum!
In other news, I am trying to set up my next ob appointment with someone OTHER than the rude, and dismissive PA that I had last time... at my first visit. What a goon. She was abrupt and demanding and cut me off when I was answering her questions and just a total jerkoff. I don't want to see her again. She was pushy and stupid. I don't care if she has over 20 years experience. I have over 22 years of experience in my field but I would never talk to a client, customer, or parent the way that jackarse talked to me. What a condesending jackass. Ugh. I want to fill out a survey that I got in the mail to let them know she was a jerky jackass but I don't want it to get traced back to me and don't want to make an enemy at the new health clinic. Grrrrrr.....
In other news I just ordered three books off amazon - Ina Gartner's guide to Birth, layboyer's Non Violent Birth, and the Doula's guide to childbirth, secrets every pregnant woman should know. Can't wait to start reading!
Meanwhile back at the ranch, I feel great! Nothing too much to report healthwise I feel great and only gained about 2 or 3 pounds so far. I'm really showing A LOT! lol.. so I'm wondering how much longer I can hide this from the people at work. Not looking forward to telling them... Hope hubby gets a job offer soon... but I'm not too worried. We still have plenty of time before we need to worry about that.
Did I report on my 13 week 2 day ultrasound yet? I just wanted to say again that our babie is BEAUTIFUL and SO PERFECT!!! He is active and wonderful and so animated!! OMG!! That little face!!! I can see his little face already!! He looks just like daddy!!!!!!! or she! lol! we'll find out the sex in about 6 weeks. I can't wait!!! OMG!!
In other news, I am trying to set up my next ob appointment with someone OTHER than the rude, and dismissive PA that I had last time... at my first visit. What a goon. She was abrupt and demanding and cut me off when I was answering her questions and just a total jerkoff. I don't want to see her again. She was pushy and stupid. I don't care if she has over 20 years experience. I have over 22 years of experience in my field but I would never talk to a client, customer, or parent the way that jackarse talked to me. What a condesending jackass. Ugh. I want to fill out a survey that I got in the mail to let them know she was a jerky jackass but I don't want it to get traced back to me and don't want to make an enemy at the new health clinic. Grrrrrr.....
In other news I just ordered three books off amazon - Ina Gartner's guide to Birth, layboyer's Non Violent Birth, and the Doula's guide to childbirth, secrets every pregnant woman should know. Can't wait to start reading!
Meanwhile back at the ranch, I feel great! Nothing too much to report healthwise I feel great and only gained about 2 or 3 pounds so far. I'm really showing A LOT! lol.. so I'm wondering how much longer I can hide this from the people at work. Not looking forward to telling them... Hope hubby gets a job offer soon... but I'm not too worried. We still have plenty of time before we need to worry about that.
Did I report on my 13 week 2 day ultrasound yet? I just wanted to say again that our babie is BEAUTIFUL and SO PERFECT!!! He is active and wonderful and so animated!! OMG!! That little face!!! I can see his little face already!! He looks just like daddy!!!!!!! or she! lol! we'll find out the sex in about 6 weeks. I can't wait!!! OMG!!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
I'm further along than I thought!
WOWWWW!! OMG!!!! So we went for our genetic counseling today (because I am over 35 and had three miscarriages to boot) and we had the nucal scan to check for downs and a blood test. EVERYTHING LOOKED PERFECT!!! OMG!!! Our perfect little baby!!!! OMG!!! So beautiful! We saw our little baby kicking and waving and floating around!!! So beautiful! We saw his little nasal bones and his head and neck look gorgeous! His long skinny legs!! Big hands!! Beautiful profile!! OMG! Oh dear! He's just so beautiful!! So that was a very good visit. He's also measuring in at 13 weeks 2 days!! So he's right on target with a due date of Sept. 19!! Wow! OH BABY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!
Happy 13 weeks today Babie!!!
Today I am 13 weeks pregnant! Yeay!! We are going to go for an ultrasound today and genetic counseling (because of my recurrent pregnancy losses and my advanced maternal age) we are having a blood test done to check for downs... No big deal. Non-invasive.. and either way- that's the way it goes! So looking forward to our appointment today and hope everything is going well and smoothly and nicely. Keep your fingers crossed! Nervous but hopeful!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Wow! Almost 13 weeks already!!
Wowee! I can't believe I'm almost 13 weeks! Tomorrow I will be 13 weeks along and I feel pretty good! I am filling out! OMG. I am definitely showing now but still hiding my belly at work until we get out of the 1st trimester and even then I hesitate to tell anyone because then I'll be getting looks every time I disappear for an appointment. WOW! So we had our first prenatal appointment last Friday. It was kind of lame. We didn't meet with a doctor just with some pushy loud mouth PA. Yuck. I wasn't thrilled with her brusk-ness. And also found out that we won't be meeting with a doc ANYWAY throughout most of the pregnancy just with the PA. Grand.
The appointment was long and it was mostly just the nurses and PA asking us tons of questions about family health history. I also had a pap smear and breast exam. Fun. :P My mother in law is a little bit overly excited about the baby news and really got all worked up to hear about the appointment and wanted to know everything that the 'doctor said.' Well- I didn't have much to report! lol. Sorry but there was no doctor and secondly it wasn't really a baby visit but a mommy and daddy visit. She kept pressing me though for information and I firmly told her the same thing I orginally told her. It was a mommy and daddy visit they just mainly asked a lot of questions about family health history and basically treat you like a number. I don't know what kind of information she was looking for exactly. Plus, it's really not any of her business what happens at the appointment and is not up for discussion. Hello. Anyway- I've come to the conclusion its just better to not mention future appointments to her because then I'll just get hounded to spill the details on everything when it really isn't anyone's business but mine and my husbands. I know everyone means well but I sometimes think they get too wrapped up in themselves and their own excitement and what they want rather than being respectful of me and hubby- we are people too! Not just babie incubators here to entertain and delight with our baby reports.
In other news we go for a genetic counseling session tomorrow and another ultrasound! Yeay!! Can't wait to see our little beannie Marie! I've told my mommah about the appointment and will give her the scoop when its over but that's it. Nobody else needs to know every single detail of my uterus and its inhabitant.
In the meantime, I am rather disappointed with the info out there in interwebs land regarding in-laws and newborns. Everything is sooo damn negative! OMG. I can't even read or look at this stuff any more! It's just the land of negativity!! For instance I googled "How to be kind, loving, and undertsanding to your in laws when you are pregannt or have a newborn." I am hoping to grow personally and to become a better person. A kinder and more gentle person. Someone who does not lose their temper or feel threatened or defensive every time an inlaw says an idiot thing or expresses their opinion. I am very sensitive and want to respond with love and kindness not to get defensive and lose my temper so I google to see what's out there and there is NOTHIHNG. NOTHING but in law bashing and scary stories that do nothing but work you up and get your feathers all ruffled!
UGH!!! That doesnt help me. All that does is get me more worked up and puts me in the mind set to pit myself against them. I dont want to do that! I want to look at my MIL and FIL like they are two out of control children who need to be loved and paid attention to but who ultimately do not control me or my emotions. Aren't there any books out there about disciplining and loving your inlaws and teaching them boundaries in a loving and non-threatening way? lol. Help.
Body update: My breasts are no longer sore! Yeay!!! I do get pulling pains in the right side of my uterus when I walk occassionally but other than that - no pains really. Once in a while I wil have a pulling sensation in my vagina. We heard the baby's heartbeat with the fetal doppler at the prenatal appointment! Yeay! 160 beats per minute! Is it a boy or a girl??? So exciting!
I'm sleeping ok with the humidifier and breathe right strips. I have pregnancy rhinitis so my nasal passages are always swollen and it is difficult to breathe most of the day. :\
Other thoughts are on breast feeding and the fact that my MIL never breastfed and only did formula with my DH. That should be interesting when she realizes I am going to breast feed exclusively for the first 1yr. I can't wait!! (To bf not to see her reaction). Also- she was going on about how easy her birth was and how she didnt gain any weight and how skinny my dh was when he was born. That's because she probably didnt eat enough. She said he was born with no fat on his body! Oy.
Anway- so what. Who cares. Im seriously thinking about taking that breast pump off the baby registry now and just buying it myself if I need it in the future.
The appointment was long and it was mostly just the nurses and PA asking us tons of questions about family health history. I also had a pap smear and breast exam. Fun. :P My mother in law is a little bit overly excited about the baby news and really got all worked up to hear about the appointment and wanted to know everything that the 'doctor said.' Well- I didn't have much to report! lol. Sorry but there was no doctor and secondly it wasn't really a baby visit but a mommy and daddy visit. She kept pressing me though for information and I firmly told her the same thing I orginally told her. It was a mommy and daddy visit they just mainly asked a lot of questions about family health history and basically treat you like a number. I don't know what kind of information she was looking for exactly. Plus, it's really not any of her business what happens at the appointment and is not up for discussion. Hello. Anyway- I've come to the conclusion its just better to not mention future appointments to her because then I'll just get hounded to spill the details on everything when it really isn't anyone's business but mine and my husbands. I know everyone means well but I sometimes think they get too wrapped up in themselves and their own excitement and what they want rather than being respectful of me and hubby- we are people too! Not just babie incubators here to entertain and delight with our baby reports.
In other news we go for a genetic counseling session tomorrow and another ultrasound! Yeay!! Can't wait to see our little beannie Marie! I've told my mommah about the appointment and will give her the scoop when its over but that's it. Nobody else needs to know every single detail of my uterus and its inhabitant.
In the meantime, I am rather disappointed with the info out there in interwebs land regarding in-laws and newborns. Everything is sooo damn negative! OMG. I can't even read or look at this stuff any more! It's just the land of negativity!! For instance I googled "How to be kind, loving, and undertsanding to your in laws when you are pregannt or have a newborn." I am hoping to grow personally and to become a better person. A kinder and more gentle person. Someone who does not lose their temper or feel threatened or defensive every time an inlaw says an idiot thing or expresses their opinion. I am very sensitive and want to respond with love and kindness not to get defensive and lose my temper so I google to see what's out there and there is NOTHIHNG. NOTHING but in law bashing and scary stories that do nothing but work you up and get your feathers all ruffled!
UGH!!! That doesnt help me. All that does is get me more worked up and puts me in the mind set to pit myself against them. I dont want to do that! I want to look at my MIL and FIL like they are two out of control children who need to be loved and paid attention to but who ultimately do not control me or my emotions. Aren't there any books out there about disciplining and loving your inlaws and teaching them boundaries in a loving and non-threatening way? lol. Help.
Body update: My breasts are no longer sore! Yeay!!! I do get pulling pains in the right side of my uterus when I walk occassionally but other than that - no pains really. Once in a while I wil have a pulling sensation in my vagina. We heard the baby's heartbeat with the fetal doppler at the prenatal appointment! Yeay! 160 beats per minute! Is it a boy or a girl??? So exciting!
I'm sleeping ok with the humidifier and breathe right strips. I have pregnancy rhinitis so my nasal passages are always swollen and it is difficult to breathe most of the day. :\
Other thoughts are on breast feeding and the fact that my MIL never breastfed and only did formula with my DH. That should be interesting when she realizes I am going to breast feed exclusively for the first 1yr. I can't wait!! (To bf not to see her reaction). Also- she was going on about how easy her birth was and how she didnt gain any weight and how skinny my dh was when he was born. That's because she probably didnt eat enough. She said he was born with no fat on his body! Oy.
Anway- so what. Who cares. Im seriously thinking about taking that breast pump off the baby registry now and just buying it myself if I need it in the future.
Friday, March 4, 2011
11 weeks 2 days and belly button pain...ow!
Ouchie. I feel good except for this pulling pain to the left of my belly button :( I hope its just the stretching uterus and stuff. My next prenatal appt or I should say my offical FIRST appointment is a week today so looking forward to that.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Insomnia.... and 11 weeks....
Hi! I am 11 weeks today! Yeay!! Feeling pretty good... getting tired very early and falling asleep alot around 630pm! or 7pm... and I usually sleep thru the night until 6am ... but tonight I got up around 11pm and havent been able to fall back asleep. I attribute some of this to my husband being up playing Sid Meyer's Civilization still! lol... Time for bed honey! So I got up and had a snack (a piece of cheese melted on potato bread in microwave) and decided to blog a bit. I had some slight cramping in my right side when we went for a walk earlier today... maybe from dehydration... and then again when I was cooking dinner by my left side of bellybutton I felt some pulling so hubby made me sit down for the rest of the night with my feet up. Now my nose is all stuffed up. My bbs are still very sore and that's pretty much it for now! I have been wearing some maternity clothes comfortably becuase I am definately showing! I'm trying to hide my pregnancy at work for another few weeks at least until we get out of the 1st trimester which will be after spring break.. or around St. Patrick's Day. It's getting kind of hard to hide it because I really have a noticeable belly already! This stuffy nose is so annoying. Hope baby is doing well and sleeping because I am not! Mwah!
Monday, February 28, 2011
10 weeks 5 days... and counting....
Hi! Ok just a quick update on how I'm feeling and all that jazz. Feeling pretty good. Bbs are still very tender and heavy and big and still hurt a lot when I sleep but I'm over it. Just went shopping for maternity clothes and nearly broke the bank but its not like I have a fairy godmother who will be buying them for me so alas, it was a necessary evil. Thank God for payment plans on credit cards. Speaking of which, the financial part of having a baby is a little bit stressful. Besides the fact that we will be losing my income after the baby is born, there are so many things to do and buy for the baby before he even gets here. A crib, a bassinet, a rocker, a dresser or changing table. I think of our house and how super tiny it is on top of it and I wonder how we will ever have people over for a birthday party or how our little family will grow. But that's not stuff to worry about for now. For now, we have to figure out how to get our nursery started. My parents have done so much for us already (too much!!) much more than we deserve and much more than the average parent I am sure. But we are so eternally grateful for their help.
The have really done everything to make sure we had a great start in life as a young married couple. Which is more than I can say for other parents. My parents bought us all of our furniture (brand new beautiful furniture) for our living and dining room, our kitchen, bedroom, etc. Everything. The gave us an amazing perfect wedding and reception and paid for everything including my bridal shower and my bridesmaids hair and makeup. My mom did everything with my shower.. EVERYTHING... no help from the other side, no help from bridesmaids, not financially or otherwise. And that's just fine. My parents are amazing. They gave us a very generous down payment for our house (my husbands parents gave us a bit to help out too, less than my parents did and his parents are wealthy whereas mine are hard working middle class and really gave us a big amount to help us out.) And nobody knows!
So you can imagine what I'm thinking about a baby shower already. It's called the other parents better pitch in and help! My parents are drained down to nothing! They have no money left and they shouldnt be put in the position where they are expected to foot yet another bill for something that is a JOINT celebration! Now I can just see how this is going to go down. We have a lot of people to invite for a baby shower and if someone other than my mom plans it- its going to be a disaster. I can tell you rightnow... someone is going to go CHEAP and its going to make me insane... I dont want expensive. I want reasonable and comfortable and lovely. Not some cheap house party. I can just see this playing out at someone's cheapo house where 90 women can not possibly gather for some gross pot-luck food that someone else hodge-podged together.
I just want a nice lovely little party. Something simple and elegant. Not the neighborhood jam session in a backyard or in someone's parlour. So we'll see how this plays out... The thing that ticks me off hte most is that my husband's parents havent even called my parents to congratulate them! Can you imagine?! They havent even picked up the phone to say congratuatlions to the parents of the woman who is birthing their grandchild. What is wrong with people? Is this normal? Is that normal to just be like.. yeay for me (for themselves) and not even acknowledge the people who brought me to this planet as the joint party and cause for celebration? How primitive. Ugh. Mad.
In other news... I feel good. No nausea though I did have some slightly on Saturday and a bit more right now.. but nothing too crazy. I did have some pulling pains in my vagina the other day but they came and went pretty quickly and it was over in a few minutes...
I need to stretch! and walk and exercise and I need to eat better. Because I've been feeling a little sicky Ive been eating whatever I am craving at the moment which is not necessarily nutritious. So I need to pay attention and eat better... eat more fruit and veggies.
I am really looking forward to having this baby!!! :)
The have really done everything to make sure we had a great start in life as a young married couple. Which is more than I can say for other parents. My parents bought us all of our furniture (brand new beautiful furniture) for our living and dining room, our kitchen, bedroom, etc. Everything. The gave us an amazing perfect wedding and reception and paid for everything including my bridal shower and my bridesmaids hair and makeup. My mom did everything with my shower.. EVERYTHING... no help from the other side, no help from bridesmaids, not financially or otherwise. And that's just fine. My parents are amazing. They gave us a very generous down payment for our house (my husbands parents gave us a bit to help out too, less than my parents did and his parents are wealthy whereas mine are hard working middle class and really gave us a big amount to help us out.) And nobody knows!
So you can imagine what I'm thinking about a baby shower already. It's called the other parents better pitch in and help! My parents are drained down to nothing! They have no money left and they shouldnt be put in the position where they are expected to foot yet another bill for something that is a JOINT celebration! Now I can just see how this is going to go down. We have a lot of people to invite for a baby shower and if someone other than my mom plans it- its going to be a disaster. I can tell you rightnow... someone is going to go CHEAP and its going to make me insane... I dont want expensive. I want reasonable and comfortable and lovely. Not some cheap house party. I can just see this playing out at someone's cheapo house where 90 women can not possibly gather for some gross pot-luck food that someone else hodge-podged together.
I just want a nice lovely little party. Something simple and elegant. Not the neighborhood jam session in a backyard or in someone's parlour. So we'll see how this plays out... The thing that ticks me off hte most is that my husband's parents havent even called my parents to congratulate them! Can you imagine?! They havent even picked up the phone to say congratuatlions to the parents of the woman who is birthing their grandchild. What is wrong with people? Is this normal? Is that normal to just be like.. yeay for me (for themselves) and not even acknowledge the people who brought me to this planet as the joint party and cause for celebration? How primitive. Ugh. Mad.
In other news... I feel good. No nausea though I did have some slightly on Saturday and a bit more right now.. but nothing too crazy. I did have some pulling pains in my vagina the other day but they came and went pretty quickly and it was over in a few minutes...
I need to stretch! and walk and exercise and I need to eat better. Because I've been feeling a little sicky Ive been eating whatever I am craving at the moment which is not necessarily nutritious. So I need to pay attention and eat better... eat more fruit and veggies.
I am really looking forward to having this baby!!! :)
Saturday, February 26, 2011
10 weeks 3 days, flat out broke and freezing!
Today is Saturday. We finally told my MIL about the pregnancy and she was thrilled and very nice about it. Yeay! Today we will tell my SIL too. She's the last one to know so we want to do something special for her. Gosh dang it- we are flat out broke. We are BROKE. We can't afford to go out with any body or take anyone to lunch and here we are doing it anyway. :\ Please God- please help my husband get a good paying job soon. Please, please please. He's been unemployed for a year since his layoff and things are so tight I could puke. We have no insulation in our house so heating it is a joke. It's freaking freezing in here. Our furance is over 30 years old and is broken and not working correctly. Our pipes are 30 years old... our electrical box is only 100 amps and should be 200... and our electric bill is thru the roof every month because the electricity draws too much energy from the 100 amp box. Oh man... Things are only going to get tighter with a baby on the way and me leaving my job to stay home and care for our newborn. Please God. We need a financial miracle soon.
In other news, I have my first prenatal appointment on March 11 and looking forward to it. I should be around 12 weeks by then. I feel pretty good. Nausea is tapering off... I feel exhausted most days very quickly. My bbs are unbelievably sore and heavy and hurt so much when I wake up in the morning or try to roll over. My face is breaking out. :\ My tummy is showing! Big time! I went to Macys to try on some maternity clothes and I'm already showing wayyy out there! It's really cute and neat. Too bad I can't afford any maternity clothes. :( Nothing fits and everything feels like its strangling me. I'm still trying to hide my pregnancy at work for as long as possible. I dont need the harrassment from my nightmare boss and I dont need questions about our plans when baby is born or when is my husband going to get a a job. I dont need that stress and am putting it off for as long as possible.
In other news I went thru my email contacts and deleted every single person that I didnt know or recognize.. there were over 500 names there.. GONZO. Time to spring clean if you know what I mean.. I also want to delete anyone on facebook whom I dont really consider a friend. LOL.. that will leave me with about 2 or 3 people! LOL. So Im slowly phasing out people whom I hardly speak to or with whom I would not share our baby news... CCCCCYYYYAAAAAA. Out with the old and in with the new... It feels really good actually. :P
In other news, I have my first prenatal appointment on March 11 and looking forward to it. I should be around 12 weeks by then. I feel pretty good. Nausea is tapering off... I feel exhausted most days very quickly. My bbs are unbelievably sore and heavy and hurt so much when I wake up in the morning or try to roll over. My face is breaking out. :\ My tummy is showing! Big time! I went to Macys to try on some maternity clothes and I'm already showing wayyy out there! It's really cute and neat. Too bad I can't afford any maternity clothes. :( Nothing fits and everything feels like its strangling me. I'm still trying to hide my pregnancy at work for as long as possible. I dont need the harrassment from my nightmare boss and I dont need questions about our plans when baby is born or when is my husband going to get a a job. I dont need that stress and am putting it off for as long as possible.
In other news I went thru my email contacts and deleted every single person that I didnt know or recognize.. there were over 500 names there.. GONZO. Time to spring clean if you know what I mean.. I also want to delete anyone on facebook whom I dont really consider a friend. LOL.. that will leave me with about 2 or 3 people! LOL. So Im slowly phasing out people whom I hardly speak to or with whom I would not share our baby news... CCCCCYYYYAAAAAA. Out with the old and in with the new... It feels really good actually. :P
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Ouch. and Frustrated with email appointments!
Ouchie. Today I had a painful pulling sensation in my vagina on the way to lunch but it went away after we sat and ate.. then again a few minutes ago while sitting here at the computer I had another spell of the pulling pain in vagina. great. Worries but trying to stay calm and go with it. Frustrated because I dont have an OB or a midwife yet and I emailed for an appointment. I got a 'call' today on my phone but no voicemail. Really? Just set up the appointment people. Frustrating. Grrr... Will call them tomorrow I guess. :\
I'm showing!
Yeay! I'm officially showing today at 10 weeks! My little tummy is popping out and my husband lovingly noticed this morning as I modeled my wrap dress. He just swooned when he saw it! We took some pics. Oh my husband! So loving! He is so overjoyed with our little miracle! And so am I!!!!
Still need a MidWife!
I gotta make some calls again today. I need a midwife or OB asap! :) I sent an email to the local hospital for an appointment with a midwife or OB but that was like 4 days ago and haven't heard anything back from them yet. What's the deal?? Argh. Anyway. Today I am 10 weeks! WOW!! And I want to see my bebe again to make sure he is ok! I'm very excited for the next u/s. I wonder when it will be? Can't wait! Feel great. Just some sore bbs. But otherwise the morning sickness has let up completely since last week.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
No more morning sickness?
Just a quick update- no morning sickness today or the last few days! Yeay!! Or I hope that is ok? :\ Great. I don't know if that is a good sign or not. Anyway- that's where I am at with that. Time for bed and hope to check in tomorrow! :)
Saturday, February 19, 2011
I'm right on target!
Or here is the other one:
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